Countries spends large amount of money on sports competitions. Do you think the advantages outweight the disadvantages.

#countries #amount #money #sports #competitions #outweight

Spending money

Change preposition

show examples

sports

competition

Fix the agreement mistake

competitions

show examples

countries

increased

Change preposition

apply

show examples

these days. In my

opinion

Add a comma

,opinion

show examples

it has positive and negative sides

however

the

advantages

have

Correct article usage

a stong

show examples

Correct your spelling

strong

show examples

stong

Correct your spelling

strong

show examples

influence

the

Change preposition

on the

show examples

drawbacks.

To begin

with

advantages

sport

competiton

Correct your spelling

competition

competitions

spread in the world

Add the comma(s)

, therefore,

show examples

therefore

people

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

culture improve by

event

Add an article

the event

an event

show examples

Also

Add a comma

,Also

show examples

people

who do

sport

can be

shows

Wrong verb form

shown

show examples

increased

Change the verb form

to increase

show examples

. Due to

this

rise,

person

Add an article

the person

a person

show examples

who is more

healtier

Correct your spelling

healthier

than now able to reveal in a few years. Harmful substance

uses

Fix the agreement mistake

use

show examples

may be decreased by

addicted

Correct article usage

an addicted

show examples

person

Fix the agreement mistake

persons

show examples

Instead

of bad

habit

Fix the agreement mistake

habits

show examples

, they prefer to do

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

or watch

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

competition. In addıtıon

to organize

Change the verb form

organizing

show examples

sport

competitons

Correct your spelling

competitions

contribute importantly to

Add an article

the country

show examples

country

Change noun form

country's

show examples

economy. Because tourists come from different

nationality

Fix the agreement mistake

nationalities

show examples

for

Change preposition

show examples

watch and attend.

On the other

hand

Add a comma

,hand

show examples

it has some

drawback

Fix the agreement mistake

drawbacks

show examples

. Due to huge

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

organization

such

as UEFA,

city

Add an article

the city

show examples

could be

crowded

Add an article

the crowded

show examples

advent of

tourist

Fix the agreement mistake

tourists

show examples

. Some transportation and accommodation

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

could

be occur

Change the verb form

occur

show examples

. Unless government cope with

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

problems, disturbing

Correct your spelling

situation

situaiton

Correct your spelling

situations

probably emerge in terms of the community.

Finally

, it

Replace the word

affects

show examples

effects

Correct your spelling

affects

show examples

rivalry among

countries

. The downside of

this

is that

people

can be racist

Correct your spelling

against

aganist

Correct your spelling

against

each other.

Furthermore

Add a comma

,Furthermore

show examples

they are so big fanatic that it

colud

Correct your spelling

could

should

be damage to surroundings. In

Correct your spelling

conclusion

conckusion

Correct your spelling

conclusion

countries

should allocate a budget for

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

activity.

Although

there are

advantages

and disadvantages,

advantages

Change the verb form

are

show examples

considerable for

countries

and

people

. Government should take

actions

Fix the agreement mistake

action

show examples

about disadvantages and arrange

competitons

Correct your spelling

competitions

Correct your spelling

various

variious

Correct your spelling

various

sports branches.

Submitted by canangul05 on Tue Sep 27 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
54Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

229 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
In many countries, traditional dress and costumes are considered effective ways of maintaining links with the past. How effective can traditional costumes be, in this sense? What other ways exist to help citizens connect with a country's past?
Most people would agree that preserving connections with our past is an admirable objective, especially as the world evolves so rapidly. I feel that traditional costumes are one part of doing this, but they are by no means the most important, as we shall see.
5
band
Some people believe that students should not be given h/w , while others claim that hw is very important in education. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
People hold different views about whether the students should not be given homework or homework is an inseparable part of education. I will examine both views in this essay by showing my own preference.
4.5
band
In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?
Nowadays, in various countries, a considerable number of individuals find that it is fascinating to get to know a background of their accommodations. This essay will deeply explain the reasons why this trend is emerged and what approach can be used to discover the past of their living places in the following paragraphs:
4.5
band
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Community service is an activity where people can help developing their community in term of humanities such as charity, voluntary teaching or improving the neighbourhood. Recently, not only someone who is listed as a member of community service, but children at schools are also allowed to get an experience to serve their communities. I agree if community service become a compulsory part of high school programme as this programme would change students' view about helping people or community in need which could lead to a great public awareness.
6.5
band
Cities are becoming overcrowded. What are the causes of this situation, and what can be done to improve this situation?
The last decades have witnessed an ever-growing concern about the great number of individuals who live in cities. In the popular perception, the vast majority of citizens affirm that cities are becoming overcrowded. In this sense, it is worth ascertaining the causes and mitigating the solutions of this phenomenon.

Countries spends large amount of money on sports competitions. Do you think the advantages outweight the disadvantages.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries, traditional dress and costumes are considered effective ways of maintaining links with the past. How effective can traditional costumes be, in this sense? What other ways exist to help citizens connect with a country's past?

Some people believe that students should not be given h/w , while others claim that hw is very important in education. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

Cities are becoming overcrowded. What are the causes of this situation, and what can be done to improve this situation?