Some children spend hours every day on smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Nowadays, a lot of kids allocate considerably their
time
to cell
phones
. I think it has different drawbacks and different reasons. This
essay will mention some of them.
To begin
with, young adults have a strong tendency toward using smartphones, and it has a variety of reasons. Firstly
, a lot of applications can be found on cellphones which are attractive to children, such
as game apps. The second reason is that parents do not control them and do not establish some rules or limitations regarding the use of smartphones, so without limitations, they keep using cell
phones
. Finally
, the third striking reason is that kids are not educated well, and government
should invest Correct article usage
the government
time
and money in this
field to educate kids to tell them about its disadvantages, and also
encourage them to reduce using
smartphones.
Wrong verb form
their use of
Furthermore
, this
matter has some drawbacks which have negative effects on young adults. The most salient hazard is that children do not spend their time
on physical activities. In other words
, they are reluctant to do some sports or play with their friends outside of the house. Therefore
, this
leads to serious diseases in their body. In addition
, if they spend all of their time
on cellphones
, they Correct your spelling
cell phones
could not
do their homework or even study well. Wrong verb form
cannot
As a result
, it prevents them to do
useful and necessary tasks related to their school tasks.
In conclusion, in my view, spending hours every day on Change preposition
from doing
cell
phones
have
an irrefutable and negative effect on children. Correct subject-verb agreement
has
This
lead
to preventing them from doing a useful and essential activity. To deal with that issue, parents and government should make rules and encourage them to do some different activities Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
instead
of using cell
phones
.Submitted by moradkhanighane on
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task response
Your essay provides a clear position and addresses the prompt, but could benefit from more specific examples and a more balanced approach to the issue.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a logical structure with clear introduction and conclusion, but the link between the ideas could be improved to enhance coherence.