School Children should choose the subjects they study from a young age and stop doing subjects they find uninteresting.” How much do you agree with this opinion and why? Give reasons and examples to support your answer.

#school #children #subjects #study #age #support

Mrs Monica Kullan Senior Nurse Practitioner University of Marchbank Health Centre Hilldunne Rd Marchbank 29 September 2022 RE:

Jake

Peterson

, DOB: 17 March 2001 Dear Mrs Kullan I am writing to introduce

Jake

Peterson

, who has intermittent alopecia suspected

due to

depression and stress. He needs continued monitoring and personal arrangement at the university.

Peterson

intially presented with hair loss in patches since he was 13. It is likely associated with anxiety

due to

school bullying. He is the referred to a Trichologist, concluded that there is no correlation and suggest it is exacerbated by his stress.

Consequently

, he was prescribed with steroid cream for which he used for three months and

then

discontinued

due to

insomia and sudden aggression. He has irregular hair growth at succeeding years.

Peterson

loose six kilograms in his weight and

then

advised to consult a doctor in regard to his recurrent symptoms.

Although

he was hesitant, he opted homeopathic remedies. There is no beneficial results in the aformention treatment rather it makes him more stress, low mood and it affects his social life. His father has pattern of baldness and his mother has ab depression . He is non-smoker,

however

, he socially drinks 20 units of alcohol weekly. It is beneficial if you could organize a separate exam room for him

due to

his alopecia. Please monitor his alcohol intake as it is increased by 8 units

last

three months. I would be grateful if you can address his concern in transferring to the university and his independent living conditions. If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to contact me. Yours, sincerely Nurse

Submitted by d_jayson08 on Thu Sep 29 2022

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Task Response

Task Response: The essay provides a relevant response to the prompt by agreeing with the statement and presenting clear reasons and examples. However, there is some lack of focus on specific aspects of the topic, which affects the overall coherence.

Coherence and Cohesion

Coherence and Cohesion: The logical structure of the essay is somewhat weak, with a lack of clear organization and coherence between ideas. The introduction and conclusion are somewhat present, but the overall flow of the essay could be improved for better coherence and cohesion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

275 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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School Children should choose the subjects they study from a young age and stop doing subjects they find uninteresting.” How much do you agree with this opinion and why? Give reasons and examples to support your answer.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Q. Some people say that school children should learn how to grow food and cook with it in their lessons. What is your opinion about that?

Some people like to do their everyday shopping at large supermarkets. Others want to go to several small stores or local markets to buy what they need. Which style of shopping do you prefer and why? Give reasons and examples to support your answer.

Many manufacturered food and drink products contain high lever of sugar which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

The advantages of the spread of English as a global language will continue to outweigh its disadvantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Public celebrations( such as national days, festivals, etc) are held in most countries. Theses are often quite expensive and some people say that governments should spend money on more useful things Do you agree or disagree?