IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that zoos are cruel and should be closed down. Others; however, believed that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both views and give your opinion Write your response not less than 250 words. You get 40 minutes to complete this task

#people #zoos #animals #minutes
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The effectiveness of freedom for
animals
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 in
zoos
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 is debatable. Some people believe that
zoos
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 have to be closed while others think it is a
place
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 for protecting wild
animals
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.
This
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 essay will discuss both sides of the argument in detail and provide reasons why
zoos
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 are cruel. On one hand, a
zoo
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 is a
place
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 where wild
animals
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 were caged to showcase for the people. Most of the
zoos
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 in India were controlled by the public sector. Wildlife researchers suggest that
animals
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 are really depressed while living in the
zoo
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, their behaviour changes and they even forget how to poach. Actually, a cheetah can run at a speed of 80 kilometre per hour but those
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 are born in a
zoo
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 are unable to run fastly when it is released into an open field.
On the other hand
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,
zoos
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 are the safest
place
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 for an animal to live. Because of the imbalance in the food chain, most of the wild
animals
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 died of hunger in the jungle. If the government focuses more on conserving forests and increasing the biosphere reserves the food available to all wild
animals
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 will be fulfilled.
For instance
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, the Canadian government created man-made forests and set a new pollution-free
place
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 for wild
animals
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 to survive. In conclusion, planting more trees will reduce the pollution rate and can save certain
animals
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 which are going to become extinct. The
zoo
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 is like a prison to
animals
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instead
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 we can save them by creating more wildlife sanctuaries and researching the habitat and food habits of
animals
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.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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