In more and more countries, people choose to give money on special occasions rather than personally giving gifts. Why might this be the case? Is it a positive or negative development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Special occasions come with the excitement of receiving some presents from friends and family members.

However

Linking Words

, people prefer to give cash to these events,

instead

Linking Words

of, sending gifts.

This

Linking Words

reflects the efforts and the intention of the person giving it, which will be

further

Linking Words

discussed below

along with

Linking Words

its possible good or negative developments.

Firstly

Linking Words

, gifting someone at a special event is a ritual in every nation. But the things we are giving the matter the most, as they will reflect the love, and affection for that guy.

However

Linking Words

, with the shrinking availability of time and lack of effort, the currency is considered the easiest and most convenient thing to give others.

For example

Linking Words

, my father

has

Wrong verb form

had

show examples

his own business and did not get enough time during the day to buy anything for my birthday. So, he transferred some cash to my bank account for my present.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, nowadays, with the availability of a huge lot of gift items, it is better to allocate money so that other humans can buy whatever they are in need of. Since, more and more consumer products are available in the market and everyone has their own taste, in that case, people were not able to judge the best gift.

Therefore

Linking Words

gifting currency

instead

Linking Words

of physical things is a positive development. In

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

conclusion, though the importance of goods as a present outweighs the value of funds, giving money is more convenient for both parties. In my opinion, giving checks will enable another person to buy whatever they

wanted

Wrong verb form

want

show examples

cshivam2675Fri Sep 30 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Your essay covers the main points but could benefit from clearer development of ideas and stronger links between them. Try to expand on your arguments with more explanations and examples.

coherence and cohesion

Consider using transition words and phrases to improve the flow of ideas. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph clearly relates to the main topic of the essay.

task achievement

You provide relevant examples that illustrate your points, which helps to support your arguments effectively.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which is important for framing your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

255 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

financial flexibility
recipient
unwanted gift
busy lifestyles
cultural shifts
socially acceptable
monetary gifts
practical
uncertain economic times
essential expenses
personal preferences
tastes and preferences
safer choice
climate consciousness
waste and sustainability
unnecessary production and consumption
freedom to choose
recipient’s needs and desires
giving money
special occasions

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Many elderly people are no longer looked after by their families but are put in care homes or nursing homes. what are the advantages and disadvtanges of this trend?
Currently, care homes and nursing homes are one of the most common choices for taking care of old-age people, instead of staying with their families. This essay will examine more about what are, benefits and the
7
band
Some people travel to foreign countries during their vacations. Others think that it is better to travel within their home countries. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Some choose to visit other countries, while others prefer domestic trips while on holiday. This essay will discuss both points of view and why I believe that international travel would make for better holidays than exploring one's home country.
6
band
Some people consider price as the most important thing to think about when buying a product (such as cell phone) or a service (e.g. medical treatment). Do you agree or disagree?
People believe that price is the most significant indicator that should be taken into account when buying a certain good. I partially disagree with this, because there is often a low correlation between the price of the good and its quality. Moreover, people's decision-making might be constructed on their own preferences and habits, so in this case, it is better to ignore the price and look for the most convenient option instead. However, the cost of a particular service, for instance, medical treatment really matters a lot, since most frequently it is strongly correlated with the characteristics of the service.
6.5
band
In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Due to the rapid developments of sciences and technology, we are currently living in the digital era. Technology has been embedded in our daily lives, as it has the ability to accommodate various kinds of one's needs. Surely, this includes our necessity to gain information about the world. Thus, different kinds of digital newspapers and books emerge, making it much simpler for us to read nowadays. However, I believe that despite its simplicity, old-school methods of reading are still a must to exist.
7
band
Many citites around the world are facing severe traffic congestion problems. what are the main causes for this issue and what solutions can be implementedt to solve it ?
Nowadays, urban cities are having trouble with heavy traffic jams. Lack of appropriate public transportation as well as excessive utilisation of cars by people is a major reason for this obstacle. Implementation of strict policies by the state along with improving the condition of the public transportation system would be the right step in the direction of gradually controlling this complication.

In more and more countries, people choose to give money on special occasions rather than personally giving gifts. Why might this be the case? Is it a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

Many elderly people are no longer looked after by their families but are put in care homes or nursing homes. what are the advantages and disadvtanges of this trend?

Some people travel to foreign countries during their vacations. Others think that it is better to travel within their home countries. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people consider price as the most important thing to think about when buying a product (such as cell phone) or a service (e.g. medical treatment). Do you agree or disagree?

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many citites around the world are facing severe traffic congestion problems. what are the main causes for this issue and what solutions can be implementedt to solve it ?