"Some people think that they can learn better by themselves than with a teacher. Others think that it is always better to have a teacher. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons to develop your essay"
After studying at high
school
, some students
choose to work
, others go to
travel until Verb problem
apply
starting
studying at Wrong verb form
they start
university
. This
problem has some benefits and negatives that I mentioned in this
essay.
On the one hand, studying in high school
is quite difficult, so students
have to spend a lot of time
passing the exam. On this
occasion, they can break to prepare for study at university
. Before they continue learning, the choice to work
or trip helps them understand themself, they know what they want and who they become. Working or travelling will carry about them many experiences that when they are students
they have not had like: eating different foods, widening their horizon
, learning new skills,... ,Fix the agreement mistake
horizons
,
Change the punctuation
apply
Eventually
they earn money for the family. For Add a comma
Eventually,
an
Correct article usage
apply
instant
, I finished my Replace the word
instance
time
at high school
in July but I started studying at university
in December so I spent 4 months working as a worker. This
job helps me have interesting experiences starting live
far from my family.
Fix the infinitive
to live
On the other hand
, some people
travel or work
so they do not have enough time
to prepare for studying. They admit themself
break over Correct pronoun usage
they
time
that
they should. Correct word choice
than
As a result
, they miss necessary information and when they go to the other city, they do not adjust. Students
feel
difficult to live far from their family and friends. They are bored and new things make they are irritable. Verb problem
find it
For example
, when studying abroad, people
need a lot of time
to understand local people
and make friends with people
in other countries and this
is really a problem.
In conclusion, students
who choose to work
or travel for a year between finishing high school
and starting university
have some advantages like having time
to rest and having many experiences but this
is can take time
for them that they use to adjust to the new circumstances.Submitted by trandung09091999 on
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task response
The essay addresses the prompt and provides a clear response to the task. However, the explanation could be more thorough and specific.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a coherent structure with clear introduction and conclusion. However, there is some lack of logical ordering and connectivity between ideas. Transition words and phrases could be used more effectively to improve coherence and cohesion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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