IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

It has become easier and more affordable for people to travel to other countries. Do you think it is a positive or a negative development? Give your opinion and relevant example from your experience.

#people #travel #countries #development
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Owing to the burgeoning opportunities individuals want to move to other
countries
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. It is believed by some
people
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 that presently
travel
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 overseas are become easy and less costly.
This
Linking Words
 essay is going to discuss both the merits as well as demerits of
travel
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 in the subsequent fragments. Irrefutably, there are a plethora of pros of
travel
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 worldwide but the vital two are learning new cultures as well as creating
a
Correct article usage
apply
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good
bonds
Correct the article-noun agreement
bond
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 with strangers. To commence with the former view many
people
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 like to visit other
countries
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 meanwhile they learn new culture and adopt it.
This
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 is because, all
countries
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 are exchanged their culture like traditional dresses, jewellery or festivals celebration and so on;
consequently
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, youngsters like to talk to overseas friends and learn new languages.
For instance
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, if businesses had not visited other
countries
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,
then
Linking Words
 they would not have changed their company facilities and trained their employees. Another reason is that many
people
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 like to meet with others
countries
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 individual because they want to talk with them and exchange their experiences. Individuals not only make overseas friends but
also
Linking Words
 they are becoming bilingual and create family relationships.
Therefore
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,
people
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 like to adopt western culture and it enjoy.
However
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, despite the various positive aspects of
travel
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 overseas it still
have
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has
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 some downside
also
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 like Brain drain in younger and economical issues.
Firstly
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, presently
people
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 want to settle
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
overseas because of better opportunities and facilities but it effect on coming generations.
This
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 is the reason, adults like to migrate overseas so that they can live
a better lives
Correct the article-noun agreement
a better life
better lives
show examples
.
For example
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, according to the Hindu ,newspaper 50% of
a
Correct article usage
the
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 population migrates to other
countries
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 every year. Thereby, it will affect on
countries
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 economy and brain drain youngsters.
Secondly
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, the government can face issues economical. Due to
this
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, big businesses would move to other
countries
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 which
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
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countries
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 decrease financially and
increased
Wrong verb form
increase
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 unemployment.
As a result
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, day by day
countries
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' capita income falls down and many small businesses and poor
people
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 face issues in their
countries
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 influence as poverty. To recapitulate,
although
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travel
Use synonyms
 to other
countries
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 is easy and affordable if the government will take some steps to overcome the shortcomings of
travel
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 too much
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 other
countries
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then
Linking Words
 its advantages overweigh its disadvantages.
Submitted by surjeet_17 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Advancements in transportation
  • Cultural curiosity
  • Economic reasons
  • Globalization
  • Educational opportunities
  • Digital nomadism
  • Healthcare tourism
  • Tourism industry growth
  • Personal development
  • Interconnectedness
  • Higher living standards
  • Remote work
  • Broaden their horizons
  • Affordable travel
  • Medical treatments
  • Global perspective
  • Air travel options
  • Cuisines
  • Lifestyles
  • Job opportunities
What to do next:
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