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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest time of most people’s lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibility. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #years #time #people’s #lives #adult #life #happiness #spite #responsibility
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Some argue that
people
Use synonyms
's
lives
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
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 happiest during
teen
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the teen
a teen
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 period while others believe that
the
Correct article usage
apply
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adulthood brings more happiness
although
Linking Words
 there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 greater responsibility. In my opinion, I believe that young
Use synonyms
people's
Change noun form
people
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 are happiest than adults.
First
Linking Words
at
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of
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 all, from an economical point of view,
teenagers
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 are not aware
about
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of
show examples
 the conditions that
exists
Change the verb form
exist
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 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
daily life.
For instance
Linking Words
, most
teen
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teens
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 do not know the facts that affect the
country
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country's
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 economy
such
Linking Words
 as oil prices in the world.
Secondly
Linking Words
Add a comma
,
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although
Linking Words
 it is very common that young peoples
do
Fix the infinitive
to do
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 some jobs in the present times, most
of
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apply
show examples
Use synonyms
teens
Add an article
the teens
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 do not have financial responsibilities like
rents
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rent
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 or housing
cost
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costs
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 owing to their parents affords these
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
. Another good reason to state that
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the teenagers
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teenagers
Replace the word
teenage
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 years are the best times in
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people
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people's
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lives
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,
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apply
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 is that during school periods young students are focused mainly
in
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on
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 the academic environment,
consequently
Linking Words
,
teens
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lives
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 their life in a happy scenario in which
the
Correct article usage
apply
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connected activities like
sportive
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a sportive
the sportive
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 championship, music festival and even scientific competition represented the daily duties that young peoples should deal with.
Finally
Linking Words
, from a social perspective
teenagers
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 most fear
about
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apply
show examples
social concepts or discrimination,
As a result
Linking Words
, they live as they consider.
For example
Linking Words
, most
teens
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 are involved in sports activities and
volunteeries
Correct your spelling
volunteer
volunteers
volunteering
 organizations as well.
Those relationship
Change the determiner
That relationship
Those relationships
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undoubtedly
Add a missing verb
are undoubtedly
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 very common among young
people
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 rather than adults. In conclusion,
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the teenagers
show examples
teenagers
Replace the word
teenage
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 years are the happiest for most
people
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duo
Correct your spelling
due
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 to the activities that normally do. There are
not
Correct your spelling
no
show examples
worriers
Correct your spelling
worries
show examples
 about current affairs like oil markets or political situations.
Teenagers
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 commonly are not influenced by social gossip.
In addition
Linking Words
, school times are very important
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
teens
Change to a genitive case
teen's
teens'
show examples
 ages because
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
 positive influence that it has
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 young's
lives
Use synonyms
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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