One of the most pressing problems facing the world today is overpopulation. What policies do you think governments should adopt to address the causes and effects of this problem?

Every
country
has its own rules and regulations.
people
should know that overpopulation will increase
government
problems
. We will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
overpopulation in
this
essay and
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will
also
share my point of view.
First
,
There
Fix capitalization
there
show examples
are many countries which are overpopulated because the major thing is that
people
don'
t
understand that after marriage
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
first
thing is to do family planning which is very important not only
their
Change preposition
for their
show examples
families but
also
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
. There are many
problems
increase
Correct pronoun usage
that increase
show examples
if the
country
is overcrowded
for example
, traffic
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
,
houses
Change the noun form
house
show examples
problems
, jobless
people
etc.
that
Correct pronoun usage
these
show examples
problems
only happen when
Add an article
a person
show examples
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
don'
t
focus on their family planning
that is
why
first
notice that we should limit our family.
Secondly
,
Government
should take action and make some rules and laws about
this
matter. They have to build new houses so that
persons
Replace the word
people
show examples
can'
t
face
Add an article
the problem
a problem
show examples
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
of living.
For example
,
Government
provide
Change the verb form
provides
show examples
free schools,
free
Correct word choice
and free
show examples
medical for poor
people
so that
people
can easily
Correct your spelling
facilitated
facilitate
facilited
Correct your spelling
facilitate
.
country
make
law
Add an article
a law
show examples
that
Correct your spelling
every
show examples
ever
Correct your spelling
every
show examples
family has only two kids. More than two kids are
Correct your spelling
against
againist
Correct your spelling
against
the law and that will
be consider
Change the verb form
be considered
show examples
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a crime. so
persons
Replace the word
people
show examples
get afraid and they make always
family
Add an article
the family
a family
show examples
plan
Fix the agreement mistake
plans
show examples
. In conclusion, Most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
Add an article
the people
show examples
don'
t
understand that situation and they don'
t
focus
this
Change preposition
on this
show examples
problem. Human beings don'
t
know they should take care of their family and
country
. Citizens
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
responsible
Replace the word
responsibility
show examples
for all
this
. If
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
don'
Change the verb form
doesn't
show examples
t
think of their
country
than
Correct your spelling
then
show examples
who will think
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
also
Government
should make strict laws
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
cause.
Submitted by Faisal on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: