Today, more people are living longer after they retire from work. What problems will it cause for individuals and society? what can be done to prevent it?

#people #work #individuals #society

Medical advance leads to a longer life expectancy for modern urbanites. While the days with no jobs after retirement, the problem of insufficient pensions may probably cause anxiety to the elderly and burden the young generation. It is a must for an authorities’ intervention. More demand for savings, as well as financial

pressure

, are brought to all dwellers since the days with no income. Not only do elder people worry about their unpredictable cost of medical needs and daily expenditures, but

also

concerns from the youth about public financial burdens are raised.

In particular

, many studies found that huge numbers of citizens with age 65 or above, especially in the lower-income group, will suffer from depression or any related mental illnesses due to money issues. Meanwhile, heavy

pressure

is brought on taxpayers.

Hence

, the unwillingness of giving birth to their offspring is usually higher in Japan or other countries with serious ageing population problems. In order to tackle the negative effects of financial

pressure

after retirement, an introduction of all-rounded elderly policies should be made by the government twofold.

Firstly

, more education on savings for pensions or wealth planning should be launched.

Therefore

, an increasing amount of elderly may find their post-working life affordable.

Besides

, methods for raising their incentives for future investment are

also

needed.

Secondly

, financial aid from the authorities may necessarily help to minimize the multiplied effects on society as the poverty problem will not affect several generations of people with low income. In conclusion, financial problem is always the main concern after retirement. Allied with the elderly, other generations

Change the verb form

show examples

the same

pressure

Therefore

, an introduction of thoughtful ageing policies, which raise incentives for saving or governmental support for those in poverty, will be an indispensable solution for society.

Submitted by 980907152 on Tue Oct 04 2022

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

293 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Today, more people are living longer after they retire from work. What problems will it cause for individuals and society? what can be done to prevent it?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Thesedays, problems with pollution are becoming worse, particularly in large cities. What are the reasons for this and how can this be solved? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The exploration and development of safe alternatives to fossil fuel should be the most important global priority today. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. Do you agree or disagree?

Detailed description of crimes on newspaper and TV can have bad consequences on society, so this kind of information should be restricted on media. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some way.