IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

It is neither possible nor useful for a country to provide university places for a high proportion of young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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There has been a point of view that it is impossible and meaningless for a nation to build academies in places that have a high rate of young individuals. In my opinion, I partly agree with
this
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 idea and the reason will be
further
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 elaborated on in
this
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 essay. It is true that providing a new
university
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 is unable to be achieved due to the government's funding.
For example
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, Viet Nam a country where teenagers have high demand to engage in
university
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,
however
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, despite the huge needs of young people, the government refused to provide educational institutions places since the budget needs to be used for other things,
such
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 as hospital, police stations and medicine for citizens. As a role of a leader in a country, the government has the responsibility to ensure people's life by balancing funds to invest in many areas.
However
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, providing a new school is crucial for youngsters due to its usefulness. Being lack spaces in
university
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 will lead to a high competition enrollment in academies, which leads to a high non-study rate. To be more specific, poor people who failed the exams of the
university
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 will have a tendency to stop studying since their expenses are unable to cover a re-study year.
As a result
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, those youngsters are unable to reach their full potential in learning, which leads to low economic growth in that country. In conclusion, I advocate with the idea of providing a new
university
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 is impossible, but oppose the view of its helplessness toward a nation

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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