IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices.

#people #choices
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By the beginning of the
21th
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21st
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 century, the
world
Use synonyms
 and
people
Use synonyms
’s lifestyles have been significantly changing. Various
option
Fix the agreement mistake
options
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 from a social and cultural point of view are
two
Correct article usage
the two
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 most important
sings
Correct your spelling
signs
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. I agree with
this
Linking Words
 viewpoint that communication tools and social freedoms have made a life full of
choice
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choices
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.
Firstly
Linking Words
, at the communication
age
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,age
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people
Use synonyms
 become closer than before and
consequently
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 they know about the
others
Correct pronoun usage
other
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people
Use synonyms
’s distinct
interest
Fix the agreement mistake
interests
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.
Accordingly
Linking Words
, with the help of technology, particularly the internet,
people
Use synonyms
 all
the
Change preposition
over the
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world
Use synonyms
 have
easily
Replace the word
easy
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 access to information about available different options.
For example
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; you can find
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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any
Correct your spelling
many
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 things about
all the
Correct determiner usage
apply
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international cuisine on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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YouTube. So, if someone
interested
Add a missing verb
is interested
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 in trying
a new food
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new food
a portion of new food
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, there are many channels
in
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through
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 which
learn
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to learn
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 how to
provide
Correct pronoun usage
itprovide
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.
Subsequently
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, it can be generalized to other aspects
such
Linking Words
 as music or education and fashion and ….
Secondly
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, social freedoms which are attained in recent years, help
people
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 to think, behave and live free. In
this
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 regard, with a few minor
exceptions
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,exceptions
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 it can be mentioned that the vast majority of
people
Use synonyms
 who live in different countries are free to have
individual
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an individual
the individual
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pattern
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patterns
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 for their life. Modern nomadic lifestyles are
remarkable
Add an article
a remarkable
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instance
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instances
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for
Change preposition
of
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 proving
this
Linking Words
 fact. They travel around the
world
Use synonyms
 sometimes even with only one backpack because
this
Linking Words
 possibility of choice has been given to them. In conclusion, we live in a free
world
Use synonyms
 with an immense amount of
alternative
Fix the agreement mistake
alternatives
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 to choose
and
Change preposition
from and
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 several ways to live. Even though a multiple-choice life can be considered attractive compared to the past, it might be seductive too.
Submitted by pejman.shojaeibarjouei on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • overwhelmed
  • decision fatigue
  • paralysis by analysis
  • consumerism
  • globalization
  • personal autonomy
  • market saturation
  • option overload
  • decision-making process
  • psychological well-being
  • buyer's remorse
  • customization
  • trade-offs
  • minimalism
  • information superhighway
What to do next:
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