IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more diadvantages?

#people #work #hours #time #leisure #activities #situation #diadvantages
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Many
people
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 work long hours leaving very little
time
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 for leisure activities. Does
this
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 situation have more advantages or more disadvantages Nowadays
people
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 spend a lot of
time
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 working. And cannot spend energy on various parties. I will discuss both aspects in
this
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 essay
First
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 of all the advantage of working for a long
time
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 is that it allows you to bring your experience to a higher level.
In addition
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, employees with more experience help to get a higher salary. Working for a long
time
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 helps
people
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 to achieve high-ranking results. Employees can show their superior other reports outside of working hours and surprise their superior.
For example
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, when our colleagues have left to play, we are still involved in processing tasks which can be as a hardworking employee by the manager. In
this
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 way when the promotion chances appear you will be the potential candidate for
this
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 ,
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However
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,However
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 it’s advantages
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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also
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 has disadvantages,which reduce productivity and cause
people
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 to lose motivation.
Such
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 an imbalanced routine can cause damage to health. Due to that fact without these humans could make unchangeable mistakes during the working process and regret them. As a
,
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apply
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consequence the employer can fire the worker and they could lose their reputation throughout their career. In a nutshell, I can say that working too much during working hours is harmful to
people
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’s health. I’m a firm believer in having the right work and balance in life.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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