IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

EXPERTS SAY IF OLDER PEOPLE SPEND THEIR TIME WITH OTHER PEOPLE AND EXERCISE DAILY THEIR LIVES WILL BE HAPPIER AND HEALTHIER. HOWEVER MANY ELDERLY ARE SUFFERING FROM LACK OF FITNESS. DISCUSS CAUSE AND SOLUTION.

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There are many reasons to affect human life and its aspects like happiness and health.
While
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 it is a common issue to have physical problems, most of the attitude problems are believed to affect our
feeling
Fix the agreement mistake
feelings

It seems that feeling may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
. In
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 essay, the probable causes and solutions will be addressed before reaching any conclusion. In comparison to some decades ago, our diet has changed a lot and
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 change accounts for many of our problems.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, we used to eat less unhealthy food like oil and many snacks have been replaced by unhealthy things like crackers.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the lack of daily workouts has been an important reason for our health issues.
Furthermore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, a bad feeling comes to everyone but the thing is how we manage it in our life. So
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 is not necessarily what makes us feel bad mentally and physically. There may be many probable and actual solutions to experience a better life.
Firstly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, there must be a plan for what we eat because it is like good fuel and bad fuel for cars; the better we eat, the more healthy we become.
Secondly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, some routines can be used to increase the level of physical movements and metabolism as well.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 specifically helps the body to recover faster and take out more toxins. In conclusion, numerous reasons are believed to affect people's health and
feeling
Fix the agreement mistake
feelings

It seems that feeling may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
.
While
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 there are some solutions as mentioned above, each person's attitude to these issues decides whether they start to get healthier and happier or not.

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task achievement
Ensure that the essay addresses all aspects of the prompt and provides a clear and comprehensive response.
coherence cohesion
Improve the organization of the essay by using clear topic sentences and logical transitions between ideas.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary and use more specific and precise words to express your ideas.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to ensure accuracy and variety in your writing.
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