One of the consequences of the improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expentancy is increasing. Do yo think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

When
people
get more medical care,
people
will have more maximum age and life
Correct your spelling
expectancy
expentancy
Correct your spelling
expectancy
will grow up. For disadvantages of
this
development,
population
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the population
show examples
will grow up
too
Replace the word
to
show examples
that need more
source
from our environment. The
world
are
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is
show examples
possibly damaged by more human.
This
Correct determiner usage
These
show examples
advantages will not outweigh the disadvantages.
Population
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The population
show examples
have
growth
Replace the word
grown
show examples
since the past, while each
people
have to receive
same
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the same
show examples
quantity of
source
.
People
may live longer but finding
source
never decrease. To
fulfill
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fulfil
show examples
their desire that respect to
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increasing
Correct article usage
the incresing
show examples
incresing
Correct your spelling
increasing
population, they will
damaged
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damage
show examples
Correct your spelling
environment
Correct article usage
the evironment
show examples
evironment
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environment
by deforestation, releasing waste
to
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into
show examples
ocean
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the ocean
show examples
, and destroying
atmosphere
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the atmosphere
show examples
. The pollution
occur
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occurs
show examples
and
bring
Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
show examples
them to bad health. As the result, they will focus on medical care developments to help
people
caused by their doing while developments to less using the
world
's
source
will be harder
which
Correct word choice
and
show examples
slowly grow. To conclude, the medical care
developements
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developments
will make
people
have better health, but they do not decrease
desire
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the desire
show examples
of humanity not to damage
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their
the
thier
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their
world
.
The pollution
Correct article usage
Pollution
show examples
steadily
increase
Change the verb form
increases
show examples
while increasing
people
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people's
show examples
age or life
Correct your spelling
expectancy
expentancy
Correct your spelling
expectancy
do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
show examples
not help the
world
to stop infinite desire.
Submitted by meanpemika on

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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