Some people think that government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In
this
contemporary epoch, surged Linking Words
increasing
in morbidity rates regarding children has become a controversial argument. Whilst some opponents emphasise that the foster parents are in charge of Replace the word
increase
this
phenomenon, some opponents and I adopt a diverse stance. in Linking Words
this
Linking Words
essay
my contention will be Add a comma
,essay
further
explained.
to embark on, despite the fact that Linking Words
Correct your spelling
parents
parenst
can put some restrictions to impede their offspring from craving harmful products, the authorities Correct your spelling
parents
borne
the brunt of conserving the teenagers' well-being. Correct your spelling
bore
this
means that when national institutions monitor restaurants which provide high-Linking Words
calori
food and impose stern Correct your spelling
calorie
colour
caloric
Correct your spelling
regulations
regeslations
, Correct your spelling
regulations
this
will decrease Linking Words
availability
of junk food. an eminent example is that Pizza Hut and Macdonalds, which are quite Add an article
the availability
upiquities
in Egypt, provide convenience meals which are full of fat and Correct your spelling
ubiquitous
carbohydates
. Correct your spelling
carbohydrates
carbohydrate
Therefore
, what can be said is that national agencies should impose laws to decline manufactured Linking Words
sandwiches
Fix the agreement mistake
sandwich
Correct your spelling
consumption
consumbtion
.
Correct your spelling
consumption
Furthermore
, governmental agencies should launch awareness campaigns to attract Linking Words
breadwinnwers'
attention to Correct your spelling
breadwinner's
detrimental
effects of carcinogenic food, and fund Correct article usage
the detrimental
for
advertisements on TV. Change preposition
apply
in other words
, if local authorities pay for commercials and Linking Words
propagand
to display the drawbacks of overweight Correct your spelling
propaganda
especially
in children, Add the comma(s)
,especially
substantial
proportion of dwellers will be more careful. Add an article
a substantial
this
can be witnessed by quite Linking Words
famous
commercial Correct article usage
a famous
Correct your spelling
campaign
compaign
in Egypt when Mo Salah participated in Correct your spelling
campaign
this
humanitarian mission against obesity. Linking Words
Accordingly
, in a final analysis, nations can boost Linking Words
inflencers
and public figures to inform citizens about the demerits of children's obesity.
in conclusion, after Correct your spelling
influencers
this
essay has manifested the above-mentioned points, it can be reiterated that The Linking Words
Minestry
of Health and Correct your spelling
Ministry
Correct your spelling
legislators
regulators
regislators
are responsible for mitigating the issue of obesity in lower-aged individuals. eventually, I am convinced that without business icons' support, young boys and girls could not have been healthier.Correct pronoun usage
its regislators
Submitted by ericssonsony551 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite