some claim that modern technology is giving people more free time, other thnik it makes them abusers

this

Linking Words

contemporary epoch, technological gadgets and their impact on adults' life have become a controversial argument. Whilst some proponents emphasise that

internet

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

has revolutionized

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

daily tasks, some opponents and I adopt a diverse stance. In

this

Linking Words

essay, both views along with my contention will be

further

Linking Words

explained. To embark on, despite the fact that

substantial

Correct article usage

a substantial

show examples

proportion of teenagers

spend

Change the verb form

spends

show examples

ample time

Correct your spelling

using

usining

Correct your spelling

using

technological means

Change preposition

for

show examples

recreation, these advanced tools have facilitated their educational commitments.

This

Linking Words

means that when youth utilise

online

Add an article

the online

show examples

network

Fix the agreement mistake

networks

show examples

to research

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

information

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and bookmark specific websites to be future references, they will save a lot of time and effort. an eminent example is

that

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

Zoom application which is used for distance education, and The Oxford dictionary which facilitates translation

instead

Linking Words

of hard-copy editions.

Therefore

Linking Words

, what can be said is that plethora of online

Correct your spelling

platforms

plateforms

Correct your spelling

platforms

are offering leisure time for young males and females.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, addiction to cutting-edge electronics has

negatively

Change the adverb

negative

show examples

effects on offspring, and they can easily become obsessed with these advanced appliances.

In other words

Linking Words

, if adolescents count on video

games

Use synonyms

as a main source of entertainment, they will become addicted to these virtual

games

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

can be witnessed by BUPGE and Fortnight

games

Use synonyms

which are considered quite

ubiduitous

Correct your spelling

ubiquitous

online video

games

Use synonyms

in Egypt.

Accordingly

Linking Words

, in a final analysis, children who rely on computers and virtual pages to enjoy, their intellectual abilities and interpersonal skills will be massively affected. In conclusion, after

this

Linking Words

essay has manifested the above-mentioned points, it can be reiterated that not only do novel electronics affect

Change preposition

apply

show examples

millennials' abilities, but

also

Linking Words

they detrimentally affect their thinking spectrum, and thoughts. Eventually, I am

convincied

Correct your spelling

convinced

that without putting restrictions

Change preposition

show examples

using computers and PlayStations,

healthy

Add an article

a healthy

show examples

lifestyle could not have been achieved.

ericssonsony551

Oct 11, 2022

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

290 words

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some claim that modern technology is giving people more free time, other thnik it makes them abusers

Your opinion

In their advertising,businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this?Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do you thinks some people might not be happy to give up using cash?

How can the government make sure that people save enough money to live on when they are old?

What are the advantages and disadvantages of leaving your country to live or study abroad?

Human activities have negative effects on plant and animal species. Some people think it is too late to do anything about this problem. Others believe that effective measures can be taken to improvw this situation. Discuss both view and give our opinion.