There is an annual work party next month, which is held every year. Write a letter to your colleagues to co-arrange the party. In your letter: Say what would you do differently than last year Say what you think were some of the things not so good last year Suggest where to meet to plan for the party.

Dear Sir/Madam, I am writing to draw all your attention to the upcoming annual work effort
party
,
this
time I’m planning some changes and additional activities that can be included in the
party
to foster enjoyment. As all of you may remember,
last
time the
party
was pretty much fantastic. The food, singing, and dance activities were followed by a trip to the national zoo. I think it would be amazing if we could do something different
this
year, how about going to the professor lake for swimming and boating? It is important to note that
last
year
Change noun form
year's
show examples
party
was fabulous,
still
Add a comma
still,
show examples
it lacks somewhere to meet our expectations. The food and dancing activities were up to the standards, but the trip to the zoo didn’t turn
as
Change preposition
out as
show examples
exciting as we thought it would be. In the end, I’m eager to hear your suggestions for
betterment
Correct article usage
the betterment
show examples
of the
party
. I will be more than happy if all can meet in
cafeteria
Add an article
the cafeteria
show examples
during the lunch break and discuss the ideas. Yours sincerely, Sameer Rana.
Submitted by sameer.rn9596 on

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Greeting and Closing
Consider starting your letter with a personalized greeting to create a more welcoming tone. Use names if possible, instead of the formal 'Dear Sir/Madam,' unless this formality is required by your relationship with your colleagues.
Task Achievement
To enhance task achievement, ensure your suggestions for improvement are clear and detailed. Specific examples of what could be done differently or how something could be improved make your proposal more compelling.
Logical Structure
For better coherence and cohesion, transitions between paragraphs can be smoothed out with more varied and natural transitional phrases, rather than abrupt changes in topic.
Task Achievement
When suggesting a new location or activity, briefly discussing the potential benefits can add to the persuasiveness of your arguments, thus improving task achievement.
Single Idea per Paragraph
Try to maintain a balance between critiquing past events and suggesting future improvements by offering constructive feedback focused on positive outcomes.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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