It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages

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It is essential for human beings to take risks, in their
occupation
Replace the word
occupational

The word occupation doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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lives
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

as well as,
their
Change preposition
in their

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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internal
lives
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. yet, there
remains
Change the verb form
remain

The singular verb form remains does not seem to agree with the plural subject some dissagrements on whether the overall impact of risk-taking in our daily life has been positive or negative, however. Consider changing the verb form.

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some
dissagrements
Correct your spelling
disagreement
disagreements

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on whether the overall impact of risk-taking in our daily life has been positive or negative,
however
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, I believe that the advantages of
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

trend going on far outweigh its disadvantages.
To begin
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

with,
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

are becoming more
consciuos
Correct your spelling
conscious

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of the importance of risk-taking as the days pass by. on the plus side of
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

Correct your spelling
phenomenon

If you don’t want phnomenon to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

phnomenon
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phenomenon

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whit our daily internal activity many could be
mention
Wrong verb form
mentioned

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb mention. Consider changing it.

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such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as, the more we
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try
Correct your spelling
try

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tned
Correct your spelling
tend
need
tied
to try our hand
on
Change preposition
at

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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new things the more
intreeguing
Correct your spelling
intriguing
interesting

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each day going to get rather than living the same life with no changes
thus
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

our purpose of living can become
varstile
Correct your spelling
versatile

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as a
consiqonse
Correct your spelling
consignee

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of risking.
although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

the advantages of blending risks with
bissuness
Correct your spelling
issues

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are
imposiable
Correct your spelling
impossible

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to ignore , as there are
vary
Replace the word
various

The word vary doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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of
exampels
Correct your spelling
examples

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indicating that
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as big companies which risked to do global trades
moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

yeilding to
high
Add an article
the high
a high

The noun phrase high amount seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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amount of income.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the downsides can not be ignored, risk-taking can place many
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

's
lives
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

or
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business
Correct your spelling
business

If you don’t want bussiness to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

bussiness
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businesses
in
sirous
Correct your spelling
serious

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jeoprady
Correct your spelling
jeopardy

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. take a kid who decides to take a
Correct your spelling
trip
Correct your spelling
trip

If you don’t want trian to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

trian
Correct your spelling
train
on his own as a new
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advantage
Correct your spelling
advantage

If you don’t want advantour to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

advantour
Correct your spelling
adventure
as the most patently
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obvious
Correct your spelling
obvious

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obviuos
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obvious
example which can
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affect
show examples
Correct your spelling
affect

The word effect doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
his internal life or what if a
Correct your spelling
company
show examples
Correct your spelling
company

The word compony doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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compony
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company
show examples
that could have excelled in
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their
Correct your spelling
their

If you don’t want thier to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

thier
Correct your spelling
their
new trade loses all the investment provided that taking risks can have a no turning back
effact
Correct your spelling
effect
effects

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on both personal and
professinal
Correct your spelling
professional

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lives
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

which is considered as a
draw back
Correct your spelling
drawback

The word draw back seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

show examples
and why many won't leave
thier
Correct your spelling
their

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comfort zone . By way of conclusion, I once
Correct your spelling
again
Correct your spelling
again

If you don’t want agin to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

agin
Correct your spelling
again
restade
Correct your spelling
restate
reside
rested

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my
Correct your spelling
position
show examples
Correct your spelling
position

The word positon doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
positon
Correct your spelling
position
show examples
that the
risk taking
Add a hyphen
risk-taking

It appears that risk taking is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

show examples
has had a
Correct your spelling
positive
Correct your spelling
positive

If you don’t want postive to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

postive
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positive
impact on
myrids
Correct your spelling
myriads
myriad

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of
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

's way of living because of its influence on
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and
componies
Correct your spelling
companies

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succses
Correct your spelling
success

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.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
What to do next:
Look at other essays: