IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that a country will benefit greatly if its students study abroad. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #country #benefit #students #study
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It is believed that studying abroad is a great opportunity for students to improve their abilities and contribute to the
nation
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. From my perspective, I do not totally agree with
this
Linking Words
 idea. On the one hand, It is indisputable that sending people to study
oversea
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overseas
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 brings many benefits to the
country
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. For the developed nations, it is the change for culture and
experiences
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experience
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 exchange. For the developing
country
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, It is not only the shortest way to learn a huge volume of cutting-edge knowledge but
also
Linking Words
 the opportunity to build connections with experts in multiple domains.
For example
Linking Words
, in the domain of health, as we know, the technique of stem cell transplant or organ transplant has been developed within two decades all over the world, but in Vietnam, we can now practice
this
Linking Words
 technique at the equivalent level of other developed countries by standing on the shoulder of the giants.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the
nation
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 may face the risk of brain drain when sending excellent students to study abroad. Indeed, many graduate students, especially the underprivileged ones, opt to emigrate to a foreign
nation
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 to have better life conditions.
This
Linking Words
 fact is a significant problem in developing
country
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 where the government do not propose a good policy to attract elite employees. In conclusion, studying
oversea
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overseas
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 represents a good way to develop a
nation
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, especially a developing
country
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.
However
Linking Words
, the government should have the ideas to improve not only the work
condition
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conditions
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 but
also
Linking Words
 the life
condition
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conditions
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 of the elite
expert
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experts
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 to avoid the risk of brain drain.
Submitted by nguyenthanhngocbinh on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and use transition words to connect them for better logical structure.
coherence cohesion
Provide a stronger introduction and conclusion to clearly present your position and summarize the main points.
task achievement
Expand on the relevant specific examples to support your main points further for a complete response.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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