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Band 3.5

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #attention
While it is true that advertisement affects
people
's
mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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other way.
Although
 some
people
 found that advertising is nothing special as it is
Correct your spelling
fundamental
foundamental
Correct your spelling
fundamental
 for selling goods to
customers
. It seems to me that it is the successful key for persuade
people
consumed
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to consume
show examples
. Many
people
 have their own opinion on what they are going to buy,
such
 as specific brands,
specific
Correct word choice
and specific
show examples
 things. They may not
going
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go
be going
show examples
 to be
Correct your spelling
affected
afffected
Correct your spelling
affected
 by the advertisement even though the posters were seen everywhere. Another thing
also
 important is, while
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
advertising is so common, they do not have the need in their life. The poster for advertisement
purpose
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purposes
show examples
always
Add a missing verb
is always
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 rich in
color
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colour
show examples
 and attractive words to catch
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
's attention.
For example
,
discount
Correct article usage
a discount
show examples
 promotion with a big red word font may let the
customers
 more
interest
Replace the word
interested
show examples
on
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in
show examples
 it.
Furthermore
,
this
give
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gives
show examples
 a
relative
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relatively
show examples
 great chance for the company especially
they
Correct word choice
if they
show examples
 want to introduce the special functions of their goods
especially
Add the comma(s)
,especially
show examples
 small company can
be know
Change the verb form
be known
show examples
 by more
people
 rather than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
big company. In conclusion, I believe that advertising shows an important role
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the ways to sell
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
things to
customers
.
Although
 it may be very common as all brands have their own
advertise
Change the form of the verb
advertising
show examples
, we can make it by more
ideable
Correct your spelling
ideal
rideable
 and creative design to attract the
customers
.
Submitted by lisapong12062003 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • persuade
  • promote
  • attract
  • influence
  • impact
  • consumerism
  • commercialism
  • market
  • product
  • brand
  • endorsement
  • manipulative
  • saturated
  • overwhelmed
  • repetitive
  • distracting
  • irrelevant
  • exaggerated
  • misleading
  • desensitized
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