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Band 5

Some people think that robots are very important to human's future development, while others think they are dangerous and have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #robots #future #development #effects #society
Nowadays,an increasing number of
people
 are concerned about the rapid growth of the robotics
industry
.
However
,whether the development of
robotics
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the robotics
show examples
industry
 would bring
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
possible adverse impacts has
cause
Change the form of the verb
caused
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 heated debate recently.
Personally
Add a comma
,Personally
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 I agree more
with
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apply
show examples
that robots are more on the side of liberating humanity from monotonous jobs and unleashing our creativity。
First
，it is obvious that the vision of the modern world where
human
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humans
show examples
 play
a
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an
show examples
 important role of the creators，and artificial intelligence will construct machines to implement these creations.One of the benefits
that
Add a missing verb
is that
show examples
 robots free workers from repetitive and tedious
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
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 and allowed them
have
Add the particle
to have
show examples
 enough time for their
creativity
Replace the word
creative
show examples
 work and innovation.Especially in
industry
Add an article
an industry
show examples
 where
Add an article
the robot
a robot
show examples
robot
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robots
show examples
 can replace a number of
people
 to do the same things just like
people
 do ,which release
the
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apply
show examples
productivity and increase efficiency.
Additionally
,in a daily life context,
more
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the more
a more
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 and more advanced
robot
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robots
show examples
 has adopted in
the
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apply
show examples
healthcare,assisting surgery to success and helping disabled and senior
people
 improve their
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
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life style
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lifestyle
show examples
.
Moreover
，
that is
 not to say that the development of
robot
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robots
show examples
 would not cause negative effort
for
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in
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 our daily life.
In contrast
，the
high speed
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high-speed
show examples
 growth of
robots
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robots'
robot's
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approach
Change the verb form
approaches
show examples
 to be
an versatile machines
Correct the article-noun agreement
a versatile machine
versatile machines
show examples
 that often complete quickly with
precise
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precision
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 and ask for no perks
such
 as insurance and paid time off，leading to
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
they
Correct your spelling
the
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increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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competition than human beings in some occupations.
For instance
， Assembly line in the automobile
industry
 has shown that the shift from human
labor
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labour
show examples
 to machine can yield high
product
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production
show examples
 efficiency. In conclusion，as with any revolution technology，
Add an article
the robot
a robot
show examples
robot
Fix the agreement mistake
robots
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 will give rise to some negative effects including
increase
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increased
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 employment pressure.But renewable development and choice
then
 come.
Therefore
,I believe
robot
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robots
show examples
 will play important role in the human’s future.
Submitted by 416627367 on

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • automation
  • precision
  • efficiency
  • production outputs
  • cost savings
  • innovation
  • medical outcomes
  • human error
  • exploration
  • hazardous environments
  • unemployment
  • economic disparity
  • ethical concerns
  • privacy
  • security
  • misuse
  • dependency
  • overreliance
  • social isolation
  • manual labor
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