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Band 4

Many people feel the urban environments are more unhealthy than they have ever been What do you think are the main causes of the problem? What measures can be effective in tackling this problem ?

#people #environments #measures
When it comes to
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environmental
environmentally
environmentall
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environmental
issue
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issues
show examples
 there are
a
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apply
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numerous important topics, including
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whether
wheter
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whether
the
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apply
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urban society is becoming more unhealthy than previously.
Firstly
 and foremost, it is
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important
importante
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important
 to understand the history behind that perception. With the
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beginning
beggining
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beginning
 of industrialisation,
on
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in
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 the 18th century, there was a change
on
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in
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social
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the social
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dynamic
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dynamics
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which
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in which
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 workers would migrate from rural to industrial areas seeking
for
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apply
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jobs. That economic change was the trigger for the urbanisation process
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leading
leding
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leading
 to a higher number of people
concentraded
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concentrated
 in a smaller portion of land. The accelerated increase of population
on
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in
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 cities
have
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has
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trigged
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triggered
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 what we now know as
megalopolis
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a megalopolis
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 where, in order to
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accommodate
accomodate
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accommodate
 the demand
of
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for
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 houses, green spaces were
convertade
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converted
to
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into
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concrete
concret
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concrete
 constructions
consequently
 reducing the renovation of H2O and decreasing the air quality
what
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which
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 led
to
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to to
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 a more unhealthy
enviroment
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environment
.
Moreover
, decades later, the superpoluted
center
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centre
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 generated mobility issues and cars became a relevant component of modern life increasing even
further
 the atmosphere
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pollution
polution
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pollution
.
Therefore
, in my
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opinion
opnion
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opinion
, the main solution
this
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to this
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 matter is to
descentralise
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decentralise
decentralised
 work
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opportunities
oppotunities
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opportunities
 and develop small towns
to
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into
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 smaller urban
centers
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centres
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 where there is still a possibility to
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maintaining
mantaining
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maintaining
 a balance between the number of buildings and nature.
Luckelly
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Luckily
,
descentralization
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decentralization
 is more possible than ever, because
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different
diferent
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different
than
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from
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 industrial jobs, our current situation does not require local presence. At the same time, there are other measures that could
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help
healp
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help
 to improve air quality,
for example
, by regulating the use of petrol as combustive and making
more
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it more
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 accessible to buy
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electric
eletric
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electric
 cars.
Submitted by rebeca_nicolas on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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