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Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can get a job when leave prison. Do you agree or disagree?

#studies #show #criminals #level #education #reason #people #crime #prison #job
Crime
 rate is a matter of considerable public concern. There are several types of research to show that a low level of
education
 causes many
criminals
. So
people
 think that the practical way to reduce
crime
 is that
criminals
 should be educated to make sure they can find a job when they
jail
. As far as I am concerned, I think educating
criminals
 is a good approach to
reduce
Wrong verb form
reducing
show examples
crime
 to some extent. On the one hand,
education
 can help
criminals
 find jobs.
People
 who have
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
not
acquired
Change the form of the verb
acquire
show examples
 more
education
 are harder to find a high-income or stable job than those
people
 who have a high level of
education
. When they have no method to make living, they are easier to become a criminal, like a thief. So these
people
 in
jail
 can be educated in some practical skills to make sure they can be good at something in some fields, which can help them find work in the job market when they leave
jail
. It can reduce
crime
especially
Add the comma(s)
,especially
show examples
 reducing the number of
people
 who leave prison to try again to become
criminals
.
On the other hand
,
education
 can ensure that
criminals
 know information from the outside world. Educating
criminals
 can make sure that they can
Correct your spelling
follow
show examples
fellow
Correct your spelling
follow
show examples
 the pace of society.
Criminals
 are punished and stay in prison so
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
they have no approach to
acquire
Wrong verb form
acquiring
show examples
 information about the development of the world.
Thus
,
criminals
 know news about another area only in some regular ways. In China,
criminals
 are permitted to watch TV, read books and have lectures about how to involve in society at the prescribed time.
Also
, they are educated to have a special
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
 like fixing machines, making shoes and so on. These methods can make sure those
criminals
 know information about other areas and
easy
Replace the word
easily
show examples
 integrate into society when they leave prison. All in all, educating
criminals
 can make sure they have practical skills to make living is a good way to reduce
crime
.
Besides
,
education
 can make sure they can follow society’s pace when they leave
jail
.
Submitted by surui1999 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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