IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that many cities in the world are now 'one big traffic jam' How true this statement is? What measures can government take to discourage people from using their cars?

Nowadays,
cars
Use synonyms
 act as a necessary part of our life as each family owned at least one.
This
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 leads to heavy traffic jams all around the world, and these can be reduced by
Correct article usage
the government
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government
Change noun form
government's
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 start to take action. There are many ways that the government can help in reducing the time of using
cars
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.
Firstly
Linking Words
, they can increase the prices of diesel and electricity power. The huge paid for petrol and electricity will force them to use their
cars
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 wisely.
For example
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, a short journey can be changed to riding a bike or just walking on your own.
Secondly
Linking Words
, they can introduce a more useful public transport system for people daily basis. The bus or train comes on time and systematically will bring more confidence to the users.
This
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 will show a great decline in the use of
cars
Use synonyms
 if the program is running successfully.
Finally
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, the tax for buying
cars
Use synonyms
 should be increased as
this
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 is the most direct way can reduce car ownership. People who cannot afford the taxes should try another way like public transport transportation. It is true that the roads now have always been crowded with
cars
Use synonyms
. A very good example shows me that ,usually journey from Parit Raja to Johor Bahru takes 90 minutes, and now becomes at least 120 minutes, especially on holidays. Many families have more than one car now, as we can observe by the car parking outside their houses.
This
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 results in a bad situation as the number of
cars
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 gradually increases. In conclusion, the number of owning
cars
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 can be controlled by the government if they really focus on the problem and the action.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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