Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this case? Do you think is a positive or negative develompent?

#children #hours #smartphones #case #develompent

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It is well known that technology has sharply become one of the most important advances nowadays. A good illustration of

this

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is the number of

children

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who allocate their time to it. I firmly believe that

this

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situation has a negative impact on

children

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’s lives. From my point of view, there are many causes that could give rise to screen addiction among kids.

Firstly

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for instance

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, sometimes, parents do not have enough hours to take care of their

children

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when they are doing different household activities.

Secondly

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, another cause could be that technological devices are so attractive to the youth, and they are not able to control the life that they expend on them.

Thirdly

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, the

last

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example is related to the

first

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one and could be the result of trying to keep

children

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quiet without disturbing them when the environment (parents, school, restaurants) is not adequate. To be honest, as far as I understand, I believe that smartphones could have adverse effects on kids.

This

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equipment can affect their social skills, hindering their social relationships and decreasing their contact with their friends.

In addition

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, if the

children

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are in their early years, it could produce aftermath in their neurodevelopmental.

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, it is thought that perceptual difficulties could have an origin in the abuse of the screen since they see them in 2D and

then

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when they grow up, they have difficulty drawing in 3D. To conclude, I consider that the time that all of us spend on these devices is currently a huge problem and I feel that it will have unfortunate consequences for

children

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who abuse the time spent on technology.

Submitted by carlos.terapiaocupacional on Mon Oct 17 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

273 words

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Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this case? Do you think is a positive or negative develompent?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some countries, companies allow people to work from home. In others, people are still expected to work in an office. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The migration of people to cities is one of the biggest problems facing the world's cities today.Disccus the main causes.What solutions could be used to tackle this situation.

Some companies have uniforms for their staffs which must be worn at all times. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this.

In spite of advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?