Some parents think that childcare centers provide the best services for children of preschool age. Other working parents think that family members such as grandparents are better caregivers for their young children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In
this
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contemporary epoch, some individuals believe that the services provided by
childcare
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facilities
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are quintessential for youth
development
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. Opponents hold a diverse view, they think that family members are better candidates for caring for their
children
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. I am of the belief that
childcare
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centres are essential for caring for infants. My contention will be
further
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explained. On the one hand, it is believed by some guardians that it is better to leave their young boys and girls with close relatives just out of fear for their
children
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,
This
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means that
,
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apply
show examples
these mothers and fathers would feel more secure if they left their infants with a member of their family.
For example
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, a survey conducted by Times News Magazine revealed that numerous guardians who have full-time jobs tend to trust their parents with the responsibility of caring for their infants during their work hours.
Therefore
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, the tendency of parents to appoint an immediate family member to care for their child is only for safety reasons.
On the other hand
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, experts in child
development
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believe that the qualifications held by
childcare
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workers play a huge role in
children
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's interpersonal
skills
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growth.
In other words
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, individuals who are working in
childcare
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centres are required to have certain qualifications in child rearing, so when
children
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are enrolled in these
facilities
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, they will be taught essential soft
skills
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that will help their growth. A prominent example of
this
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is a study conducted by Oxford University which showed that young
children
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who are enrolled in
childcare
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facilities
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showed a higher degree of interpersonal
skills
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development
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than those who are left with their immediate family.
Hence
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, enrolling young individuals in
facilities
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specialized in bringing up
children
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is quintessential in their
development
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. In conclusion,
after
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this
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essay has manifested the points mentioned above, it can be reiterated that some parents rely on their relatives to care for their
children
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, and
childcare
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facilities
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are a better choice for rearing their
children
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. I believe that
children
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who are enrolled in these
facilities
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will have an easier time later in their lives
due to
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the
development
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of their soft
skills
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.
Submitted by kokoelking1 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
The essay needs clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to enhance understanding. Also, try to connect ideas more fluidly.
Task Achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points and make them relatable. This can strengthen the argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction clearly outlines the two sides of the argument and states your perspective effectively.
Task Achievement
The essay contains a balanced discussion of both viewpoints, indicating a well-rounded understanding of the topic.
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