New research has shown that overeating has become a bigger problem in the world than hunger. What are the reason for this problem? how can it be solved?

this

Linking Words

contemporary epoch,

food

Use synonyms

overconsumption has become a controversial argument. Whilst

this

Linking Words

trend imposes a veiled threat, I

emphasize

Change the spelling

emphasise

show examples

that the main reason behind

this

Linking Words

food

Use synonyms

advertisements, and state involvement is the key solution to

this

Linking Words

issue. In

this

Linking Words

essay, both causes and solutions will be

further

Linking Words

elaborated. To embark on

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

despite

Fix capitalization

Despite

show examples

having detrimental health problems, the exaggerated consumption of dietary products is encouraged by

food

Use synonyms

campaigns.

This

Linking Words

means that if a commercial

use

Correct subject-verb agreement

uses

show examples

the snacks of children's favourite cartoon characters, adolescents will crave these snacks and take excessive bites. An eminent example of

this

Linking Words

is the Nutella advert, which gives an

illusive

Use the right word

elusive

show examples

image concerning its

ingredients

Punctuation problem

ingredients,

show examples

although

Linking Words

it is loaded with palm oils and refined sugars.

Therefore

Linking Words

, in a final analysis, the influence of dietary publicities on teenagers' odds cannot be neglected.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, governments play a quintessential role in mitigating

this

Linking Words

problem, but

this

Linking Words

cannot be accomplished without raising public awareness.

In other words

Linking Words

, if authorities censor false

commercialized

Change the spelling

commercialised

show examples

information , they will be able to control the exaggerated

food

Use synonyms

craving among youth.

This

Linking Words

can be witnessed in Egypt

where

Punctuation problem

, where

show examples

awareness-raising campaigns have started to pervade.

Accordingly

Linking Words

youth's

Correct article usage

the youth's

show examples

high alertness is the main way to a healthier society. In conclusion,

after

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

essay has manifested the above-mentioned points, it can be reiterated that not only can advertisements raise public knowledge, but

Linking Words

also they can

Correct word order

they can also

show examples

lead them to overeat. Eventually, I am a staunch believer that without young people's education, snacks and fast

food

Use synonyms

could have been ubiquitous, and the significant reason for their prevalence is misleading advertising.

ericssonsony551

Oct 18, 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

improvement

Use a clear main idea in the first line of each paragraph.

improvement

Link ideas with easy words like 'first', 'also', 'but', 'so' to flow well.

improvement

Give a reason for each point and a small proof or example.

error

Check small grammar errors, for example 'use' should be 'uses' and 'publicities' is not a common word here.

improvement

Finish with a short restate of your view in the end.

content

The writer shows a clear view that ads can cause overeating and that people need to be taught.

structure

There is a start with an intro, body, and a close.

content

Examples like Nutella ad and a campaign in Egypt are used.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether. Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?
In today’s world, more people are choosing to reduce air travel in an effort to safeguard the environment. While air travel has long been a convenient way to connect people and support global business, its environmental consequences are now under scrutiny.
7
band
Some peole say that too much time and resources are spent on the protections of wild animmals and birds. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
At this time, animal extinction is increasing excessively. The main reason for that is people complain about why animal conservation is considered too much
7
band
A lot of money is spent nowadays searching for oil. As the world's oil resources will eventually run out, it would be more logical to spend some of this money on developing new sources of power, such as wind and solar. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.
Because oil is such a precious fuel a great deal of money is spent looking for it. Some people believe that this is a waste of our time as oil will not last forever therefore we should spend some of this money advancing new power sources. I agree with this point and think that we should stop focussing on oil supplies as not only it is not sustainable but it is also damaging to the environment. Oil is not only very expensive but it is also one of the most commonly sold commodities on the planet. For this reason, many people have invested great sums of money in locating and extracting it. Countries that have been able to find oil supplies have seen a huge rise in their GDP and a related rise in their population’s living standards. However, oil is not a renewable energy source and one day the earth’s supplies will run out. For this reason, it is not logical for us to continue having dependence on oil and should instead devote time and money to the development of sustainable alternativ...
6.5
band
In many countries the cost of living is rising. What are the effects on individuals and society? What measures can be taken to deal with this problem?
Nowadays, living costs have increased dramatically, and this phenomenon may cause several problems in society. Besides, there are some methods to overcome this situation.
7
band
6.The cost of flying has decreased significantly over the last decade. This has made overseas travel much more accessible. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend.
International flight prices have dropped substantially over the last decade, and they will more than likely continue to decrease. While this trend has allowed many more people to travel to many more places, providing both cultural, professional, and personal benefits, the negative impacts cannot be ignored. In this essay, I will outline the positive aspects of this increase in air travel and explain the serious environmental impact it is having.

New research has shown that overeating has become a bigger problem in the world than hunger. What are the reason for this problem? how can it be solved?

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether. Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

Some peole say that too much time and resources are spent on the protections of wild animmals and birds. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries the cost of living is rising. What are the effects on individuals and society? What measures can be taken to deal with this problem?

6.The cost of flying has decreased significantly over the last decade. This has made overseas travel much more accessible. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this trend.