IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2

Some people think it is more important to spend public money on prompting healthy lifestyle in order to spend it on the treatment for people who are already ill. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #money #lifestyle #treatment
I
Correct your spelling
completely
completly
Correct your spelling
completely
 agree with spending public money on treating people who are
Correct your spelling
already
alredy
Correct your spelling
already
 ill. it is very important to build a
Correct your spelling
healthy
healty
Correct your spelling
healthy
 public
Correct your spelling
society
socity
Correct your spelling
society
 if each of the
Correct your spelling
individual
individuals
indivial
Correct your spelling
individuals
 is healthy,
lefting
Correct your spelling
lifting
letting
 out a minority will turn all the
persons
Replace the word
people
show examples
 who
like
Correct your spelling
live
show examples
 in an ecosystem in danger towards illness if some are left out not to be treated
Its
Replace the word
It's
It is
show examples
 been
Correct your spelling
happened
happen
happend
Correct your spelling
happened
 in history that neglecting the health issues of
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
some will lead to the breakage
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
harmful
Add an article
the harmful
show examples
 pandemic. as in the early
ninteenth
Correct your spelling
nineteenth
 century the outspread of
sapnish
Correct your spelling
Spanish
 flue was the cause of
forbiding
Correct your spelling
forbidding
 the treatment
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
minor people who were not able to afford the medical expenses in the aftermath it is found that the major part of
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 in the europian
contintent
Correct your spelling
continent
 was wiped out of the disease As it is very important to take care of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fellow beings in the premise
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 a
Correct your spelling
healthy
healty
Correct your spelling
healthy
 community . the public money which must
a
Add a missing verb
be a
show examples
contribution from all the individuals of that community
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
should
be spend
Change the verb form
be spent
be spending
show examples
 for the better life of the whole public society . if
any one
Correct your spelling
anyone
show examples
 left out it will affect much of the
Correct your spelling
society
socity
Correct your spelling
society
 if
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
spread
Change the verb form
spreading
show examples
 illness
Submitted by Renjitha Joseph on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: