People are becoming famous with the help of TV programme and the internet. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

#people #help #tv #programme #internet

• In our modern life, technology has been proven to be a revolution in almost

every day

Correct your spelling

everyday

show examples

type of areas and the majority of individuals becoming well-known with the help of television programs and

through

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

internet

. Because the

Internet

is one of the most

easily

Change the adverb

easy

show examples

ways

Remove the comma

apply

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if you want to be a famous

person

. In

this

essay, I will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of

to become

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becoming

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famous through the

internet

and television programs. • There are a number of significant benefits of becoming

famous

Correct article usage

a famous

show examples

person

on the

internet

or telecast.

First

of all, The easiest way to get rich

with

Add a missing verb

is with

show examples

low investment. Because if

people

create a video or a video based on their talents, they can post it on the

Internet

for free, and if the

people

really like

this

person

's work,

this

person

will quickly become famous.

For example

, if we take bloggers, they earn a lot of money by taking a simple video and posting it on the

Internet

, and according to statistical data, 65% of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

famous

people

today are

people

who are known through the

Internet

. • Turing to the other side of the argument despite

its

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the

show examples

benefits it

also

has it

is disadvantages

Change the verb form

is disadvantaged

show examples

First

of all Famous

people

are under everyone's attention and observation and cannot live a free life and they always try to be perfect. Because the government is aware of everything that famous

people

do.

For example

, if we take artists, they work and live only according to the opinion of

people

. • In conclusion having weighed everything mentioned up and I can come to

Correct article usage

the

show examples

conclusion that

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apply

show examples

it is easy to get rich through

internet

Add an article

the internet

show examples

or TV shows, but it comes with

responsibility

Correct article usage

a responsibility

show examples

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

285 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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People are becoming famous with the help of TV programme and the internet. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

More and more people today are visiting extreme places such as Antarctica or the Sahara desert. What are the advantages or disadvantages of such travels?

The responsibility of preventing and reducing global environmental damage lies in the hands of politicians and individuals have little impact. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Some people fail in school, but end up being successful in life. Why do you think that is the case? What is, in your opinion, the most important thing to succeed in life?

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying

Some people believe that education is important to get jobs while others believe it its experience and skills. Discuss both views and give your opinion.