IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Government should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#government #money #railways #roads
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Many
people
Use synonyms
 travel every day and in order for them to have a safe and Constable trip government Theory new
roads
Use synonyms
 or improves the older ones. Some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that
expenditure
Correct article usage
the expenditure
show examples
 of government funds should be focused on
railways
Use synonyms
. I personally agree with
this
Linking Words
 idea and things that are more important.
First
Linking Words
 of all, it is proven that travelling by train is safer than travelling by car,
therefore
Linking Words
, if
people
Use synonyms
 travel more by train and less by car, the number of road accidents will decrease significantly.
This
Linking Words
 means that if the number of available
railways
Use synonyms
 increased, more
people
Use synonyms
 would have the chance of using safer means of transportation and
consequently
Linking Words
,
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 would die because of road accidents.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
railways
Use synonyms
 help travellers access a variety of places without feeling the need to use their personal cars.
This
Linking Words
 can be good for the environment since pollution produced by trains is much less than by cars.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, trains can carry more
people
Use synonyms
 at the same time. You can help
people
Use synonyms
 save both money and time because they are fast and definitely cause less than a trip by car.
Lastly
Linking Words
, during the past couple of decades, the focus on building and reconstruction of
roads
Use synonyms
 has been a lot . There are
roads
Use synonyms
 and highways everywhere but, there are fewer places connected to a sufficient network of
railways
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. That's why it is important for the government to spend more money on trays
instead
Linking Words
 of
roads
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. In conclusion, while
roads
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 and road travels are important, I think raises are much more important and there are lots of improvements that need to be done
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
 them.
This
Linking Words
 is why I agree with
people
Use synonyms
 who say that governments should spend more money on
railways
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by bayatz80 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainability
  • environmental footprint
  • efficiency
  • pollution
  • cost-effectiveness
  • economic development
  • accessibility
  • public transportation
  • congestion
  • air pollution
  • initial investment
  • maintenance
  • upgrades
  • rural
  • urban
  • last-mile connectivity
What to do next:
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