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Band 2.5

Some people say that in the modern world it is very difficult for people to have a healthy lifestyle. Others, however, say that it is easy for people to be healthy and fit if they want to be. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #world #lifestyle
Some
people
 say that in the modern world it is very difficult for
people
 to have a healthy
lifestyle
 but some
people
 say that it is easy for
people
. I think it is difficult. Before 2022,
people
needs
Change the verb form
need
show examples
 to eat fish, beef and so on, it is very healthy, and in 2022, it
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 so many foods in our life,
such
 as KFC, burger king and so on. it is very unhealthy. If you should go to work or study, sometimes you have no time to eat breakfast or lunch, you must
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
eat quickly-food, it’s very unhealthy
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 your health.
For example
, I have a sister,
she
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
also
 has no time to eat breakfast,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
 her ill in
stomach
Correct pronoun usage
her stomach
show examples
, she always
go
Change the verb form
goes
show examples
 to the hospital and she’s very
like
Correct subject-verb agreement
likes
show examples
 to eat KFC, there’re all tell us
have
Add the particle
to have
show examples
 a healthy
lifestyle
 is really difficult. If you want to keep your health, I think you should
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
play basketball more and have a good healthy
lifestyle
. Eating breakfast is important, please remember to eat it. And don’t study or work too late, it’s seemed important point, if you don’t have good sleep, you must
lazy
Add a missing verb
be lazy
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 other days,
this
 is a very bad healthy
lifestyle
.
Submitted by melindaguan0704 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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