IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many countries are experiencing population growth and need more homes. should these new homes be constructed in existing cities or should new towns be build in countryside

#countries #population #growth #homes #cities #towns #countryside
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It is an undeniable fact that
,
Remove the comma
apply
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"population
Correct article usage
the "population
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 is increasing at an alarming pace around the globe ." Owing to
this
Linking Words
 , many nations need more accommodations to live
.
Change preposition
in .
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 It is a debatable issue that the new
houses
Use synonyms
 should
be build
Change the verb form
be built
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 in existing
cities
Use synonyms
 whereas others opine that new
towns
Use synonyms
 should
be build
Change the verb form
be built
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 in suburban areas .
This
Linking Words
 essay intends to cast light on both views before deriving a meaningful conclusion . To commence with , there are
plethora
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a plethora
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 of reasons
of
Change preposition
for
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 building new
houses
Use synonyms
 in existing
cities
Use synonyms
 . The most prominent one in
this
Linking Words
 regard is that it will prevent
further
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 citing of trees for new accommodation. To elaborate
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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, new
houses
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are often build
Change the verb form
are often built
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 by clearing foresee
that is
Linking Words
 deforestation which
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 an adverse impact on
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
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 whereas if new
houses
Use synonyms
 will be constructed in old
cities
Use synonyms
 and
towns
Use synonyms
 no trees or forest will be demolished . Resultantly , it will cause no harm to
environment
Add an article
the environment
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 . On the paradoxical side , there are multifarious advantages of making new
towns
Use synonyms
 in countryside areas . The most pertinent one which can be affixed in
this
Linking Words
 regard is that new
cities
Use synonyms
Correct your spelling
provide
proved
provid
Correct your spelling
provide
anew
Correct your spelling
a new
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 and fresh atmosphere to live in . To elaborate
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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, if all the individuals would reside in a particular city it can make it overcrowded and there
is
Change the verb form
are
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 more
chances
Fix the agreement mistake
chance
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 of spreading infectious diseases like Viral diseases and Influenza . Ergo , it can give rise to a pandemic
thus
Linking Words
 leading to various health ailments . To recapitulate , after sifting through both views it can be stated that making new
houses
Use synonyms
 in existing
towns
Use synonyms
 or developing new
towns
Use synonyms
 in countryside areas have their own merits .
However
Linking Words
 , no matter wherever the new accommodations
are build
Change the verb form
are built
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 the needs of the individuals must be
caterd
Correct your spelling
catered
located
 without causing much harm to
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
.
Submitted by jashanjotaulakh49 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Urbanization
  • Infrastructure
  • Urban sprawl
  • Overcrowding
  • Sustainable development
  • Greener living spaces
  • Economic boost
  • Public services
  • Planned communities
  • Housing affordability
  • Social cohesion
  • Amenities
  • Cultural integration
  • Ecosystem
  • Alleviate
What to do next:
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