IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Nowadays, in the society consumer goods are cheaper to buy. Do the advantages outweigh disadvantages?

#society #consumer #goods
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These days the products used by
the
Correct article usage
apply
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individuals are
much
Change the adjective
muchly
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affordable
Correct quantifier usage
more affordable
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 to purchase. I certainly opine that even though it
have
Change the verb form
has
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few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 drawbacks, positives have an upper hand which I will depict
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
in the following passages.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
hence
Linking Words
 the rate of consumer goods
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 reduced to a greater extent it is paving
Correct article usage
the ways
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ways
Fix the agreement mistake
way
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 towards eradicating starvation. Because it is found that
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
 of the world's population is coming under the poverty line since
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 the price of consumer goods
such
Linking Words
 as rice and grains are lowered majority of the population can have
privilege
Change the article
the privilege
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 to consume these food grains which eventually
lower
Correct subject-verb agreement
lowers
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 the famine in the nations.
For example
Linking Words
, in Tamil Nadu government introduced a scheme to provide rice at 2 rupees which
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 successful and it was found that poverty around the state was reduced to a greater extent. Once the price of daily use commodities
are
Change the verb form
is
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 made cheap for
purchasing
Add an article
the purchasing
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 power of people will increase and eventually brings fortune to the nations by
increase
Add an article
an increase
the increase
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 in life expectancy.
In addition
Linking Words
, it can even help to decrease
child
Add an article
the child
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 mortality rate. Once the daily use
protein
Change preposition
of protein
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 supplements and cereals are made affordable,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
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 of the mothers would be able to consume
when
Correct pronoun usage
them when
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 they are in their maternity period which
provide
Change the verb form
provides
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adequate
Add an article
an adequate
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 level of supplements for the child in the womb. For an instance, In Africa, during
the
Correct article usage
apply
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pregnancy
Add a comma
,pregnancy
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 the apex authorities
provides
Change the verb form
provide
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 adequate protein for the mother which is
cost
Add a hyphen
cost-effectively
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effectively
Replace the word
effective
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 and reflect the result in the
Correct your spelling
newborn
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new born
Correct your spelling
newborn
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with
Change preposition
apply
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health
Replace the word
healthy
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 and immunity. It is important to bring down the infant mortality rate
through
Change preposition
by
show examples
 providing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
supplements at
lower
Correct article usage
a lower
show examples
 cost helps
this
Linking Words
 scenario.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, when the fare of daily use products
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 made cheaper profit margin for the authorities along with the producers will be lowered which may
results
Change the verb form
result
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 in the withdrawal of farming done by the individuals. To illustrate, recently when the return of tomatoes decreased considerably most of the farmers who were producing
this
Linking Words
 product turned their land for cultivating other
high yielding
Add a hyphen
high-yielding
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 crops. To conclude, it is important for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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nations to bring the daily usage of food grains cheaper because it certainly
improvise
Change the verb form
improvises
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the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life expectancy and lot many advantages. Even though, it
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 demerits positives take the leap.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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