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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Information technology is changing many aspects of our lives and now dominates our home, leisure, and work activities. Do the benefits of information technology outweigh the disadvantages?

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Information
Use synonyms
technology
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 is influencing a lot of parts of our lives and now
besiege
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besieges
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 our houses, free
time
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, and occupation activities which
its
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is
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 beneficial
overcome
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to overcome
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 its crises.
Technology
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 advancement has
accompanied
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been accompanied
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with
Change preposition
by
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 unmeasurable merits to humans’ lives.
Correct your spelling
First
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Fist
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First
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 and foremost, it has improved our communication owing to online platforms. There are numerous applications
in
Change preposition
on
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 cellphones and laptops which allow
people
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 to connect with each other throughout the world.
Thus
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, it creates a window of opportunities for
people
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 in various fields,
such
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 as finding desired jobs.
Furthermore
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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information
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technology
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 has a crucial role in saving
time
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. Thanks to the internet, accessing
to
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apply
show examples
information
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 has been easier and more convenient,
hence
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 individuals
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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no longer need
long
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a long
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time
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 to find specific
information
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.
For instance
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, they can surf the browsers, and in
Add an article
a short
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short
Add a comma
,short
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time
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 reach the data they require.
Moreover
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, new hobbies have been emerging from
this
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 development. Thrilling entertainments are available
in
Change preposition
on
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 the internet which
make
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makes
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people
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 utilizing in their free
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
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.
For example
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, many applications have been designed games
in
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on
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 cutting-edge devices with
high
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a high
the high
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graphic
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graphics
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 which draw peoples’ attention.
However
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, there are some drawbacks
in
Change preposition
to
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this
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 development. Less giving respect
to
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for
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 the elderly is one of its disadvantages. Since the internet
give
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gives
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 practical answers to questions, the young are not relied on the old groups to use their knowledge and experience.
Consequently
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, they do not show respect to senior
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
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 as much as in the past.
In addition
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, it has caused less physical activity to
crowed
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crowd
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.
People
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 are
engaging
Replace the word
engaged
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to
Change preposition
with
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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technology
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 most of the day which
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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means that most of their
time
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 is passing by seating.
For instance
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,
people
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 do their work and study behind the table, or they
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
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shop while they are seating on their sofa.
Correct your spelling
Therefore
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Therefor
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Therefore
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, they are faced with enormous health problems. In conclusion,
information
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technology
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 is affecting our lives in many angels. Its numerous pros
such
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 as better communication, saving
time
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,
Correct word choice
and exiting
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exiting
Correct your spelling
exciting
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 entertainment
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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more than its cons, namely lesser respect
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 old
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
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 and causing health issues.

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Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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