IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Using a computer everyday can have more negative than positive effects on children. Do you agree or disagree? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The diagram explains the distribution of
families
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' weekly
income
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 on 8 different heads for two different years,
that is
Linking Words
 1968 and 2018. Overall, while food accounted for the highest weekly expenditure in 1968,
families
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 splurged the most on housing in 2008 on average.
In addition
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 to that, of all the expenditures,
families
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 spent roughly the same
income
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 each year on household
goods
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. Regarding the year 1968,
although
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 most
families
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 spent the minority of their
income
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 on fuel and power, household
goods
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, and personal
goods
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, they spent the majority of their
income
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 on food, housing, and fuel and power.
Furthermore
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, they spent nearly as much on leisure as they did on housing. As for the year 2008,
families
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 were spending more, on average, on leisure activities than housing, with 22% and 18% respectively.
Furthermore
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, about less than 5% of
income
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 is directed towards personal
goods
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, the least of all weekly expenses. The expenses of housing have doubled in the period.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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