IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Many people today find they have insufficient time to spend with their families, because of pressures of work. What problems does this create for individuals and their families? What solutions can you propose? Which would be the most effective solution, in your view?

#people #time #families #pressures #work #create #individuals
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, most people would like to achieve a
work
Use synonyms
-life balance. Unfortunately, some of them failed, by arguing that
time
Use synonyms
 is insufficient to have the
work
Use synonyms
 done. The disproportion between families and
work
Use synonyms
 has been frustrating them. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will discuss the problems that cause
this
Linking Words
 situation along with the solutions in my latter view. 
Firstly
Linking Words
, working alone presents a great independent performance, but working together can lead to having
work
Use synonyms
 done more quickly in an efficient era. Some people prefer getting the
work
Use synonyms
 done by themselves without others' cooperation. These might waste their
time
Use synonyms
 as opposed to completing the job together. So, it is important to trust your colleagues,
also
Linking Words
 better compliments would have been reached.
Hence
Linking Words
,
work
Use synonyms
 can be done in
time
Use synonyms
 without sacrificing the individual's moment. 
Besides
Linking Words
 that, confidence is essential when you handle the
work
Use synonyms
. Some people lack it so
this
Linking Words
 may bring them to keep re-planning different types of proposals.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the leader is important to boost their employee confidence and some positive thinking by holding a boot camp. These could
also
Linking Words
 improve the relationship between them and
also
Linking Words
 help them a way to relieve their pressure.  In conclusion, it's crucial that carry on the
work
Use synonyms
 in a team
instead
Linking Words
 of working alone and
then
Linking Words
 having a positive mind during the
work
Use synonyms
do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
show examples
 bring benefits. The company's leadership and colleagues should be helping each other to overcome the dilemma in order to achieve a
work
Use synonyms
-life balance. In my opinion, a professional consultant must be considered to lead the job done in sufficient
time
Use synonyms
 and keep their individual
time
Use synonyms
 as well.
Submitted by yeejing2009 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • 1. **Flexible working hours**: Work schedules that allow employees to vary their arrival and departure times.
  • 2. **Remote working**: Working from a location other than the traditional office, usually from home.
  • 3. **Work-life balance**: The equilibrium between personal life and career work.
  • 4. **Mental health**: A person’s condition with regard to their psychological and emotional well-being.
  • 5. **Paid family leave**: Time off work with pay granted to employees to take care of family members.
  • 6. **Time management**: The process of planning and exercising conscious control of time spent on specific activities.
  • 7. **Prioritize**: To arrange or deal with in order of importance.
  • 8. **Guilt**: A feeling of having done wrong or failed in an obligation.
  • 9. **Neglected**: Suffering a lack of proper care.
  • 10. **Behavioral issues**: Actions and mannerisms exhibited by individuals, often resulting from stress or emotional instability.
  • 11. **Support systems**: Networks of people who provide an individual with practical or emotional support.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: