Some people prefer to provide help and support directly to those in need. Others however prefer to give money to national and international charitable organisations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The debate over how

people

should help others in need is ongoing, with some viewing them merely as

people

should donate to national and international charities,

while

others argue that it is better to give help and support directly to those in need. Both perspectives have valid points and understanding these viewpoints is crucial in forming a balanced opinion. Initiating with the points supporting the first school of thought,

firstly

, supporting

people

in need in a direct

way

is more effective. The

people

who support

this

say that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

it can prevent charities from stealing and using money donated in an appropriate

way

For example

, there was an incident where a major charitable organisation had used donations personally not sending them to

people

suffering from poverty and lack of water.

Thus

directly helping them would be a significant method to prevent these crimes.

Also

, donors can bond with

people

they helped and make relationships by sending what they made or letters.

People

who actually became friends with

people

they donated to were proud of themselves and were touched when they received things back. On the contrasting side,

people

who hold another viewpoint say that charities can use money more effectively to help others.

People

having a hard time

due to

a lack of resources like medication and water have a high possibility of being unable to get an education.

Therefore

they would be innocent in knowing ways how to protect themselves and improve their life quality.

In addition

, many

people

give money to charitable organisations as it is more trustworthy than other methods. In my opinion, the most effective

way

to help

people

in need is supporting them directly rather than donating to the charity as bonding with them can influence donors in a positive

way

and is clear to see how they are affected by the donation.

Submitted by wjddbs2206 on Tue Sep 03 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples or case studies to strengthen your points. This can help make your arguments more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main point and that these points are logically connected. Avoid introducing new ideas in the conclusion.

coherence cohesion

Refine your introduction and conclusion so that they clearly outline the scope of your essay and provide a concise summary of your arguments.

task achievement

You have addressed both viewpoints and provided your own opinion, which is essential for a balanced discussion.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

task achievement

Your writing shows a good command of the English language and the ideas are relatively clear.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

307 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In the present world, poverty has become the main issue all over the world. people are suffering from hunger and disease due to the lack of money and resources the country has. some individuals believed that giving funding to underdeveloped countries could improve the condition and solve the poverty problem. I disagree with this opinion, through this essay I will discuss and elaborate my perceptions.
7
band
These days, many people have their own computer and telephone, so it is quite easy for them to do their job at home. Do advantages of working at home outweigh diadvantages?
In recent decades, technology has allowed people to reduce their workload as they can work from anywhere including at home, cafes, and other places. The Work From Anywhere (WFA) policy gives advantages to workers because it allows them to manage their time freely and decrease their stress levels. However, WFA regulations might have consequences, such as delayed jobs and services. This essay will analyze both the benefits and consequences of WFA before concluding.
5
band
The unlimited use of cars may cause problems. What are those problems? In order to reduce the problems, should we discourage people to use cars? Give a reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.
A controversial belief has arisen about using cars, many people believe that it is essential to reduce using them because of the various problems that they cause. In this report, I will present some harmful sequences of using them, and then I will explain why people should avoid this kind of transportation.
5
band
Some old people today's struggle with the use of modern technology such as smartphone and computers. what is the cause of this? what are the some possible solutions?
It is true that older people nowadays find some difficulties in using modern gadgets such as smartphones and computers. Although we are living now in different era where using technology has become dominant, senior citizens still struggle with this aspect. In this essay, I will elaborate on the root causes and possible solutions.
9
band
Last month you had a holiday abroad where you stayed with some friends. They have just sent you some photos of your holiday. Write a letter to your friends. In your letter: •thank them for the photos and for the holiday •explain why you didn’t write earlier •invite them to come and stay with you
I am sorry that I didn't write to you after my return. I was busy with some problems and I couldn't contact you.

Some people prefer to provide help and support directly to those in need. Others however prefer to give money to national and international charitable organisations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

These days, many people have their own computer and telephone, so it is quite easy for them to do their job at home. Do advantages of working at home outweigh diadvantages?

The unlimited use of cars may cause problems. What are those problems? In order to reduce the problems, should we discourage people to use cars? Give a reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.

Some old people today's struggle with the use of modern technology such as smartphone and computers. what is the cause of this? what are the some possible solutions?