Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behavior.Other disagree and think that the host country should wecome cultural difference.Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #visitors #countries #customs #behavior #host #country #wecome #difference

In recent times, tourism is becoming a more popular business.

People

can earn lots of funds from travelling. Some

people

believe that visitors should follow local customs and behaviour. I disagree with

this

However

, I agree with half of

this

passage that we should welcome the new

culture

and both view reasons will explain in

this

essay.

To begin

with, some

people

believe that we should not gain the other influence from other countries due to the preservation of their ancient traditions.

For example

, through the food, and tea

culture

of the Japanese , there are many steps how to make tea. And now the purity of the taste and processing was disturbing by the selling. When

people

are wanted to make a profit from tourism,

people

are focusing more on the price than the steps.

Hence

, the true processing of making tea is blended.

Secondly

, it can be seen that some

people

are always improved their own business by receiving the other

culture

from another.

For instance

, in the fashion business, despite the money they are earning, the trend has to be up-to-date, attracting customers and selling their own sales. New fashion styles and clothes are

also

influent by celebrities, popstar or k-pop from all over the world.

People

tend to dress and wear clothes as well as the person they are like.

As a result

, It can

also

make them happier. To sum up, there are many benefits and drawbacks of receiving other influences from another

culture

such

as food and fashion. I believe that we have the freedom to choose what is appropriate and which is the most for our life.

Submitted by =) on Mon Oct 31 2022

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

274 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

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Accurate linking words

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Varied vocabulary

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Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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