Some people believe that team sport prepare their children for their future careers while others do not agree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #team #sport #children #future #careers

Some individuals believe

team

sports

groom

children

to be ready for their

careers

this

is because to them, cooperation is an integral part of working whereas others disagree

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

since they understand that competition results in cheating. In my opinion

team

Add a comma

,team

show examples

sports

are beneficial because they show the value of hard

work

. Some people argue that

team

sports

teach

children

how to cooperate and

this

helps with future

careers

. According to them, teams that succeed are those whose members

work

together to avoid losing. In

team

sports

this

skill is more apparent than in any other activity that

children

engage in, and,

as a result

, those who play on a

team

have an advantage when working on a

team

later in life. Those who feel that

team

sports

are not an advantage understand that

this

type of competition often leads to cheating. Compared to playing other

sports

children

are more likely to be encouraged to cheat by their

team

members due to the desire to win at all costs. As

this

mentality is

then

brought to the workplace, it only allows for

short term

Add a hyphen

short-term

show examples

success

and inevitably leads to shame and the loss of jobs. Both views put forward, my opinion is that

team

sports

help

children

in their future

careers

because they learn the value of working hard. They understand that

success

does not come easily, and

children

who play on a

team

realize that they must

work

hard to win.

This

realization transfers directly into one’s career as

they

Correct pronoun usage

one

show examples

know that hard

work

will result in

success

. In conclusion, some believe that

team

sports

will lead to

children

being better prepared for their future

careers

because they will learn the value of cooperation, while others disagree as they understand that competition can result in cheating.

However

, my viewpoint is that these

sports

benefit

children

as they realize that hard

work

will lead to

success

Submitted by muhammednabeel1566 on Tue Nov 01 2022

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Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

315 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that team sport prepare their children for their future careers while others do not agree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

It has been suggested that cars and public transport should be banned from city centres and only bicycles be allowed instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that students should study in their own city. However, many students prefer to study far away from their home. Do the advantages of studying away from home outweigh the disadvantages

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems.

Nowadays, more people are migrating to other countries than ever before. In order to become integrated into society in their adopted countries, immigrants should abandon their old ways and adapt to local customs and codes of behavior.Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that economic growth is the only way to end hunger and poverty, while others say that economic growth is damaging the environment so it must be stopped ? Dicuss both views and give your opion.