IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

There are citizens in some countries that paid high money amounts in taxes, but in consequence education and health are free

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There are citizens in some
countries
Use synonyms
 that paid high money amounts in
taxes
Use synonyms
, but in consequence education and health are free. It happened likely more in developed
countries
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 in the world with higher purchasing power. According to the main topic, the high level of payment in
taxes
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greatly
Add a missing verb
is greatly
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 justifiable,
Correct word choice
and become
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become
Wrong verb form
becoming
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 a significant advantage because in return the population have education and health
services
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 free. Meanwhile, when
the
Correct article usage
apply
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people obtain these important
services
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 for
they
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
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 and their
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
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, their life condition get to improve. The governments who developed
this
Linking Words
 good practice were altruistic
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 and created
a very structured social systems
Correct the article-noun agreement
a very structured social system
very structured social systems
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thinking
Change preposition
of thinking
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 really in the population and a posterior social development, that
to
Change preposition
in
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 the future
ensure
Correct subject-verb agreement
ensures
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 the progress of every social class.
For instance
Linking Words
, if one professional or employee, have
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
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services
Use synonyms
 for his family, he do not have to think
in
Change preposition
about
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 anything else that his work, entertainment, social life, and
other thing
Change the wording
another thing
other things
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 not to
critics
Replace the word
criticised
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, due to main basic topics
as
Correct quantifier usage
such as
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 family health or educations for his kids are covered. Comparing the
last
Linking Words
 comments about advantages face on disadvantages, the
first
Linking Words
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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situations outweigh the
second
Linking Words
 ones. Frequently,
this
Linking Words
 kind of policy is applied in developed
countries
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 where the people have more earnings than
develop
Change the form of the verb
developed
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countries
Use synonyms
,
there
Correct your spelling
where
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 the
people
Change noun form
people's
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 incomes are lower becoming
in
Change preposition
apply
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a social problem if the same policy were applied. In conclusion,
Linking Words
this
Change the determiner
these
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 policies have a lot of
advantage
Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
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 in some
countries
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 with
a high levels
Correct the article-noun agreement
a high level
high levels
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 of medical
services
Use synonyms
 and structured programs of education, where the
taxes
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 justified
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
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 free
services
Use synonyms
. In
develop
Change the form of the verb
developing
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countries
Use synonyms
, if the government raise
taxes
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, could be negative for
population
Add an article
a population
the population
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 that does not have enough money to cover its own requirements, for that reason
these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
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 of
services
Use synonyms
 have to be paid separately. Someday I hope in
whole
Change the article
the whole
show examples
 world could have
this
Linking Words
 model of
politic
Replace the word
political
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 culture.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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