Some high schools require all students to wear school uniforms. Other high schools permit students to decide what to wear to school. Which of these two school policies do you think is better?

Pupils are often distracted by flaunting their stylish outfits
whereas
Correct word choice
when
show examples
they should concentrate
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on
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ob
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on
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their education.
Hence
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
uniforms must be implemented to overcome
this
disbalance. In my
opinion
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,opinion
show examples
this
statement is wrong.
This
essay will discuss the reasons why wearing
uniform
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a uniform
show examples
is not important and it’s not always about being narcissistic.
To begin
with, there’s nothing bad about wearing clothes
by
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on
show examples
your
status
.
For example
, low-
status
students
will work for their future life by watching others who excel
them
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in them
show examples
.
Likewise
, they will be prepared for life’s injustice.
On the other hand
, inequalities can be felt between
students
. In
any
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anyways
show examples
ways
Fix the agreement mistake
way
show examples
, we are living in a capitalist society. The same uniforms for all states were in the years of
USSR
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the USSR
show examples
, under socialism.
Lastly
, not all uniforms are
in
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of
show examples
good
qualities
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quality
show examples
. Some factories use cheap fabrics because they win the tender and need to earn more money. To solve
this
problem, we should create the example of
uniform
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a uniform
show examples
rather
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than
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that
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than
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offer
Wrong verb form
offering
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done models.
For-example
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For example
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,
white
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a white
show examples
shirt
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shirts
show examples
and black pants, respectively,
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and skirt
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skirt
Fix the agreement mistake
skirts
show examples
for girls. Every other student can cloth as they afford. From my point of view,
following
Change preposition
by following
show examples
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
rules
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,rules
show examples
we can balance the
status
inequality and let
students
dress appropriately for their position. In conclusion,
students
who wear fashionable clothes are not always trying to show their
status
. It’s about conveniences, tastes and preferences. Eventually, being able to create fashionable outfits is not
excess
Correct article usage
an excess
show examples
skill.
Additionally
Add a comma
,Additionally
show examples
we should not judge and restrict their wishes for their
status
.
Submitted by janiaa.uk on

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Word Count

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