IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

#spite #advances #agriculture #people #world #case
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is true that the development of
agriculture
Use synonyms
 has had significant
advances
Use synonyms
 in many
countries
Use synonyms
 all over the world but there are several
people
Use synonyms
 who are facing famine day by day. In general, there are various solutions to tackle
this
Linking Words
 problem, and one of the ways is organizing more volunteering campaigns to share
food
Use synonyms
 for starving
people
Use synonyms
 and
also
Linking Words
 providing modern
agriculture
Use synonyms
technology
Use synonyms
 for poor
countries
Use synonyms
. The main reason for
this
Linking Words
 situation is that the existing
advances
Use synonyms
 made in
agriculture
Use synonyms
 were mostly created and applied in developed
countries
Use synonyms
.
Also
Linking Words
, the
advances
Use synonyms
 made in
agriculture
Use synonyms
 can raise the prices of foods since the cost when producing these foods is higher due to the application of modern
technology
Use synonyms
 for
agriculture
Use synonyms
.
Thus
Linking Words
, many poor
countries
Use synonyms
 can not afford the amount of money that they have to spend to develop modern
agriculture
Use synonyms
 technologies and facilities, which can lead to a lack of
food
Use synonyms
 for their residents.
For example
Linking Words
, organic rice
such
Linking Words
 as the ST25 in Vietnam, which is developed in the laboratory by new genetic
technology
Use synonyms
 is more expensive than normal rice,
therefore
Linking Words
 it is mainly being exported because average
people
Use synonyms
 with a basic standard of living cannot eat it every day. Overall, I think that
this
Linking Words
 situation can be solved by making sure that all the residents globally can have an equal chance to have enough
food
Use synonyms
. To achieve
this
Linking Words
, international organizations like UNICEF should have some policies or volunteering campaigns to apply agricultural
advances
Use synonyms
 to supply
food
Use synonyms
 for poor
countries
Use synonyms
 and poor citizens. Developed
countries
Use synonyms
 can share modern
technology
Use synonyms
 in
agriculture
Use synonyms
 with developing
countries
Use synonyms
 to help them produce more
food
Use synonyms
 for their residents. In recent years, Japan has shared with Vietnam about new technologies in
agriculture
Use synonyms
 to grow rice that has better quality. In
this
Linking Words
 regard, the issue can only be resolved by applying the modern
agriculture
Use synonyms
 system to provide more
food
Use synonyms
 for hungry
people
Use synonyms
 worldwide.
Submitted by checkwiring9 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • inequality
  • distribution
  • access to resources
  • climate change
  • natural disasters
  • political factors
  • economic factors
  • agricultural practices
  • infrastructure
  • transportation
  • population growth
  • education
  • knowledge
  • food waste
What to do next:
Look at other essays: