Some people think learning painting and drawing at school is a waste of time while others think it is important. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

#people #school #waste #time #points

Some

people

think learning

art

such

as painting and drawing at school is a waste of time while others think it is important. In my opinion, learning

art

at school gives

people

have good imagination which is one of the important parts of success in the future.

Therefore

this

is a significant subject at school.

To begin

with, researchers said that most of the successful have developed

brain

Fix the agreement mistake

brains

show examples

which

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

utilize both left and right brains. At

first

, we have known that have left

brain

controls logic and the right

brain

controls the imagination. And students who are good at math or physic or some logical subject always have their left

brain

developed and vice versa, students who have a right

brain

developed

always

Add a missing verb

are always

show examples

good at

art

or creative subjects.

However

, using both sizes of brains can help them easier to memorize

Correct quantifier usage

more.

show examples

For example

: most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

memorable

Add an article

the memorable

show examples

people

in the world, who can remember a long number in seconds said that they imagine a story in their head and can remember

better

Correct pronoun usage

it better

show examples

Second

, learning painting and drawing help students improve the flexibility of their hand and knowing about

art

help them enjoy beautification and make their lives happier.

Finally

, even though many

people

have different

opinion

Fix the agreement mistake

opinions

show examples

, I believe that understanding

art

makes

people

more civilized, and peace-loving thereby our lives will be happier.

Submitted by buiphuongmai on Sun Nov 06 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

223 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

self-expression
creativity
problem-solving
critical thinking
cultural literacy
historical awareness
therapeutic
career relevance
design principles
STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Mathematics)
non-essential
resource allocation
standardized testing
practical use

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Some people think learning painting and drawing at school is a waste of time while others think it is important. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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