IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that teenager should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time . This can be benefit teenagers and the community as well . To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #teenager #community #work #time #benefit #teenagers
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There are a lot of young
people
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 who go to do unpaid
community
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work
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 after school. Some
people
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 think that it is good for both young
people
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 and the
community
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. My view is that unpaid
community
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 jobs can provide teenagers and the
community
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 with a lot of advantages.
First
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, it is obvious that young
people
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 can have a good experience
for
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apply
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doing
community
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work
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.
This
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 is because they need to learn how to communicate with different kinds of
people
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 who are living in
this
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community
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 and how to
work
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 together. So they can learn something different
that is
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 not from books.
Moreover
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, young
people
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 can build
a
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apply
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good
relationship
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relationships
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 with other
people
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.
For example
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, young
people
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 can meet
with
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apply
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other
people
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 who are
in
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of
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the
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apply
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similar age and they can make friends easier after working together.
Therefore
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, young
people
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 should have more friends in the same area and have a better memory.
On the other hand
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, the government can save money for the
community
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 because young
people
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 can do some
community
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job
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jobs
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 for free.
For instance
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, teenagers can clean the
community
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’s park regularly, so that the government can spend less money on it.
Moreover
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, the government can use that money to organize some activities for
public
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the public
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. In summary, I think that it is good for teenagers to attend some different events of
community
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work
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 without pay, which will be a good experience for them in the future. So, it is good for parents to encourage their young kids to do some
community
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 jobs.
Submitted by yingfengli630 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • mandatory
  • community service
  • empathy
  • real-world issues
  • problem-solving skills
  • social skills
  • networks
  • constructive
  • detrimental activities
  • college applications
  • job resumes
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