Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

In
this
era, when we go to some places,
such
as recreational places or
museums
, we need to pay the
ticket
. There are some
museums
that give free entry tickets to the visitors
while
others charge the visitors. In my opinion, I believe that the rules that charge
people
for admission to
museums
outweigh the disadvantages, and I will discuss points that support my beliefs.
Firstly
, a place
such
as a museum needs maintenance to keep its existence. Not only the maintenance but the staff who work there must be paid. We know that some countries will allocate some money to
museums
.
Therefore
, the museum can still run its operation daily. In my opinion, the financial support from the government can be allocated to other things,
for example
, supporting education as the
museums
can charge
people
to pay for the
ticket
. From
this
perspective, it will become a win-win solution as the governments can focus on the other things.
Secondly
, the
museums
will run independently, and the revenue for the maintenance will come from the entry
ticket
. I believe
this
will positively impact the
museums
as their management can manage the money to focus on preserving the
museums
. Though
museums
are places where everyone can learn about history or art, and it is the government’s obligation to let the public enter the
museums
for free, if that condition applies, the
people
will enter the museum freely, which can result in overcrowded conditions.
Overall
, it can be seen that the advantages of charging
people
to buy the
ticket
to enter the
museums
outweigh the disadvantages. The
museums
can run independently and preserve the sites with their incomes.
Submitted by nadiamanda.salsabilla on

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coherence cohesion
Develop a more logical flow by using a range of cohesive devices and paragraphing appropriately. Link your ideas more clearly throughout the essay.
task achievement
Provide a balanced discussion covering both sides of the argument before concluding with your opinion. Your essay should cover both the advantages and disadvantages in equal measure.
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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Admission fee
  • Revenue stream
  • Maintenance
  • Overcrowding
  • Commercialization
  • Cultural heritage
  • Diverse attendance
  • Community ownership
  • Access to culture
  • Visitor experience
  • Exhibit quality
  • Cultural mission
  • Reliance on funding
  • Government subsidies
  • Cultural accessibility
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