Some people believe the purpose of education is to make people useful to society. Others believe it is to prepare them to achieve their ambitions. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #purpose #education #society #ambitions

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Individuals are divided in their

opinion

Fix the agreement mistake

opinions

show examples

regarding the context of academic learning. To

someone

Correct your spelling

some

show examples

, the motto of studying should be providing services to the community

whereas

Linking Words

many others think the main intention of a student should be achieving their own goals. Both schools of thought make sense to a certain extent and

hence

Linking Words

both sides of the argument will be discussed in the subsequent paragraphs.

To begin

Linking Words

with, it is obvious that persons with organizational learnings can contribute to the development of a nation more efficiently through their specialized knowledge and expertise

in particular

Linking Words

fields of their studies.

For example

Linking Words

, when someone studies medical science society desires him/her to serve in healthcare institutions in order to ensure the medical treatment of the general public.

Therefore

Linking Words

, almost every field of study has a core motive to serve society and no learner can deny

this

Linking Words

fact. Again,

one

Use synonyms

of the significances of education is to make a person free of societal restrictions.

According to

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

point of view, education should be for the freedom of

one

Use synonyms

's own choices so that s/he can be anything they want whether it brings societal benefit or not.

For instance

Linking Words

One

Use synonyms

may have the desire to be a singer which seems unimportant to run a nation but

one

Use synonyms

should have the right to build his career in singing as long as it does not harm citizens. In fact, songs can play a vital role in recreation related to

people'

Change noun form

people's

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mental health which is not any less important.

However

Linking Words

, after pondering both views, I can say whatever the purpose people think of learning, schooling always serves the well-being of society either directly or indirectly.

Hence

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to conclude

Linking Words

, the motto of study does not necessarily lie on any sole objective rather it is for the betterment of the nation as a whole.

Submitted by barson.mithun392 on Mon Nov 07 2022

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task achievement

The essay provides a good discussion of both perspectives. However, for a higher score, consider expanding on the implications of each viewpoint and providing more depth in your analysis.

coherence cohesion

The transitions between paragraphs are smooth, but you can use linking phrases to ensure even greater coherence. Consider using words like 'furthermore', 'in addition', or 'moreover' to connect ideas.

coherence cohesion

Your essay maintains a logical structure, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. To improve, make sure each paragraph fully develops a single main idea.

task achievement

The essay discusses both views and addresses the task prompt effectively, providing a balanced perspective.

task achievement

You included specific examples, such as becoming a medical professional and a singer, which help to illustrate your points.

coherence cohesion

The introduction sets up the discussion clearly, and the conclusion summarizes the main points effectively.

coherence cohesion

The essay exhibits a logical progression of ideas, with separate paragraphs for each perspective, making it easy for the reader to follow.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

303 words

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Some people believe the purpose of education is to make people useful to society. Others believe it is to prepare them to achieve their ambitions. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Your opinion

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some believe that people are naturally born as leaders while others feel that leadership skills can develop.Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that reading is always a good habit , others feel it depends on which books a person is reading . Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people believe that construction of new public buildings such as museums, towns halls and sporting is more important than renovation of the existing ones, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.