In many countries, people live longer and longer. Does this development have more disadvantages of advantages?

#countries #people #development

The advances in the medical field have increased the average life expectancy. In my opinion,the disadvantages outnumber the advantages.

This

essay will argue that the drawbacks associated with overpopulation and scarcity of resources overpower the advantages related to

economical

Replace the word

economic

show examples

gains. An increase in the duration of life has several drawbacks

such

as limitations in the availability of basic needs and an increase in the population. First of all,

this

will boost the number of citizens residing in a particular nation.

This

sudden rise in population might overburden the healthcare sector.

Besides

this

, the increased statistics of senior citizens will need more critical care because of which hospitals will be completely saturated providing little or no healthcare for the young.

In addition

this

, basic resources will be depleted at a rapid rate.

Moreover

,there will be a shortage of daily essentials like food and water.

For instance

, the recent population growth spurt seen in India resulted in the shortage of water supply across draught-prone regions. Despite these significant downsides, there can be some

economical

Replace the word

economic

show examples

benefits seen with an escalation in the number of people in a country.

This

means that there will be more citizens working in factories, industries and businesses.

Therefore

this

can boost the economy and the financial dividend.

For example

, in China the age of retirement was increased from sixty years to seventy years,

this

led to an increase in the sum of workers in many industries, which in turn gave the country many monetary benefits.

Although

this

is a fair benefit, it is surely overpowered by drawbacks. In conclusion, the increased longevity of life has a good result on the economics of a nation.

However

, the downsides associated with the scarcity of vital resources and overpopulation are valid.

Hence

, I believe that the disadvantages are more than the advantages.

Submitted by divkapadia on Wed Nov 09 2022

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Task Response

Task Achievement: The essay provides a response to the prompt, but the arguments are not fully developed. More comprehensive ideas and specific examples are needed to fully address the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion

Coherence and Cohesion: The essay has a clear logical structure and presents an introduction and conclusion. However, the supporting points need further elaboration to enhance coherence and cohesion. Additionally, the use of relevant specific examples will improve the overall flow of the essay.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

304 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In many countries, people live longer and longer. Does this development have more disadvantages of advantages?

You drive to work, but have recently had a problem parking your car at the office. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter describe the problem with the parking explain how this is affecting you suggest what should be done about the problem

Some old people today struggle with the use of modern techonologies such as smartphones and computers. What is the cause of this? What are some possible solutions?

Many efforts have been made by countries to address challenges concerning the environment but the situation have not improved. What are the possible reasons for environmental degradation? Are there any solution to combat this problem?

It was predicted that people in the 21st century would have much more free time than in the past. To what extent has this prediction come true?

the maps below show an industrial area in the town of Norbiton, and planned future development of the site. summarize the information and make comparison. write 150 words.