IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

There are now detailed reports about crimes on TV and in newspapers. Some people say that crime details should be restricted in the media. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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Many television programs and newspapers have published crime-related content to the public in the contemporary world. People complain that those released
media
Use synonyms
 elements should be restricted in detail. If not, related reports could affect the
next
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 generation directly. It is agreed that released content on
media
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 should be censored in a legal process.
Firstly
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, the responsible department needs to scrutinize various TV plays and movies imported seriously;
otherwise
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, they might contain improper videos or images, like violence, sex or extreme horror, etc. It could directly influence youngsters, making them unable to concentrate on studying and working anymore. Once the part of unhealthy publishing leaked to the public。
Secondly
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, excessive pornographic or vulgar forms of
media
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 possibly mislead young people to commit a crime to a large degree.
For instance
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, frequent gunshot cases in the US can be caused by relevant violent attacking scenes performed on TV programs.
This
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 kind of detailed report about crime）
Media
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 are incredibly harmful to adolescents because young people might be misled and do something wrong. The situation might seduce youth to imitate dangerous behaviours and even step into offence. In a word, except for fast and effective law enforcement, the authority is obligated to issue relevant laws and regulations to restrict crime-involved content published on traditional
media
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 and especially on modern
media
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 like WeChat and TikTok, and so on.
Likewise
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, responsible municipal departments need to cope with it well.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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