Some parents believe that students must work at school and spend their free time learning their school lessons, while others believe that students need to spend their free time playing and developing other skills. With which opinion do you agree? Use spesipic reasons to support your opinion?
It is widely acknowledged that nowadays the government is carrying out a lot of changes in the education field day by day.
Hence
, some people
think that students should learn in their leisure time with school textbooks and other people
are against this
idea which they need to occupy other activities
. I firmly believe that the latter view is the right decision and I will support this
view with arguments in the following paragraphs.
Firstly
, by learning school lessons students can improve their knowl8. Therefore
, playing sports games and developing other skills can help to spend entertainment in their free time. In other words
, it leads to a better quality of their life and boosts work-life balance. For example
, thousands of people
visit a lot of sports centres , libraries , extra lessons and other such
things in order to enjoy their leisure time. These activities
can teach people
not only to give some bits of knowledge but also
to be responsible
, methodical and good-natured, managerial experience . Add an article
a responsible
the responsible
This
, in turn, helps attain very
success .
Correct word choice
apply
Secondly
, engaging in such
activities
can be free from stress and pressure. Undoubtedly, it broadens your horizons. Students who obtain
less stress do not struggle to keep abreast with society.
Verb problem
experience
However
, if a student does not want to learn such
activities
, their parents need not force them to study them . This
can lead to extreme consequences in the future as the child would only measure their success based on academic rather than personal success.
To sum up
, taking everything into consideration although
learning these activities
is some
hard, I soundly believe that these cannot outweigh their advantages.Correct your spelling
somewhat
Submitted by uluga2002 on
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Task Response
Provide a clear opinion and support it with specific reasons throughout the essay. Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are present and effectively summarize the main points.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on organizing the essay with clear topic sentences and supporting details. Ensure that there is a clear progression of ideas throughout the essay.
Lexical Resource
Expand the range of vocabulary and use academic language more appropriately. Also, ensure that the language used is precise and conveys the intended meaning clearly.
Grammatical Range
Work on sentence structure and accuracy. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement, verb tenses, and word order for clearer expression of ideas.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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